“We’ll check her vitals again at shift change in 3 hours” L&D nurse to a husband who watched his wife drop a plastic fork and pass out. He grabbed another nurse and dragged her into the room for help.  Mother’s blood pressure had bottomed out and she was crashing as a result of being given a medication used to lower blood pressure to stop pre-term contractions.

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“There is no such thing as an epidural headache.”  -L&D nurse’s response in a hospital birth class after I asked about the risk of getting a headache from an epidural..

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“Well, I know she said you were 6 1/2 cm dilated, but her 6 1/2 or 7 is my 4.  So I’d call you 4 cm dilated.” -Said by L&D nurse, just before mother proceeded to hit transition.

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From this article:

http://heraldextra.com/news/local/central/provo/article_3085b44b-cf7c-5029-ac0b-0b2bdb8baadf.html

This is what the hospital spokeswoman said to the reporter when asked about birth plans:
“Generally the mother agrees with the doctor. In the rare case that she doesn’t, there is a line of authority to override the mother’s wishes, but again, that’s unusual”- Hospital Spokesperson to reporter when asked about birth plans.

Intermountain Health Care is the company that owns both the hospital and the infamous Aspen Women’s Clinic where “The Sign” is posted.

http://heraldextra.com/news/local/central/provo/article_3085b44b-cf7c-5029-ac0b-0b2bdb8baadf.html

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“Where’s your cervix?” -OB said after inserting a speculum. Removed it and inserted one that was thinner and longer, then said, “Wow, there is NO way a baby is coming out of that!”  This occurred at a 12 week prenatal pap smear.

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“If you go home now,  I can’t be held responsible for what happens.” -OB after mother refused to be induced on her due date for her first baby, when an Non Stress Test revealed that everything was fine.

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“Why do you need to pay for a doula?  We will tell you everything that you need to do.” -OB

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“Let me do my job as the doctor and you do your job and be a good patient.” – OB  to the mother and her partner who were asking questions about procedures.

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“Oh, I know that you are concerned about tearing.  You should get the epidural so that I can control your pushing to prevent tearing.” – OB to a mom concerned about tearing due to scar tissue.

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“… and you shouldn’t be afraid of home birth. It’s natural and
normal.”- Midwife, who then paused briefly and went on to say “Did you know the world is predicted to end in 2012?”

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