Sep 232009
 

“Are you a smoker? You push like one. If you can’t hold your breathe longer, we’re going to be here all day.” -L&D nurse after mom pushes twice.

Share Button
  
 September 23, 2009  L&D Nurse, pushing 2 Responses »
Sep 232009
 

“Now I’m just stirring the pot a little” -CNM in a freestanding birth center, while performing an unauthorized membrane stripping, during a reluctantly-agreed-upon vaginal check at 40 weeks.

Share Button
  
 September 23, 2009  CNM, Midwife 4 Responses »
Sep 222009
 

“Delivering en caul has no benefits to either mother or baby, and its pretty icky to look at! The baby looks like something out of Alien! So, I always artificially rupture the membranes (AROM) if they have not broken on their own.” – CNM in a hospital

Share Button
  
 September 22, 2009  AROM, CNM, Midwife 15 Responses »
Sep 222009
 

“Stop making noises! If you’re making noises, you’re not pushing!” -OB to unmedicated mom vocalizing during pushing stage.

Share Button
  
 September 22, 2009  OB, pushing 11 Responses »
Sep 212009
 

“Stop pushing! Don’t let that baby come out!” -L&D Nurse to mom, after having the mom push to crowning before calling the OB for delivery.

Share Button
  
 September 21, 2009  L&D Nurse, OB, pushing 6 Responses »
Sep 212009
 

“The breast is not a substitute for a pacifier.” -OB to new mom.

Share Button
  
 September 21, 2009  breastfeeding, OB 10 Responses »
Sep 202009
 

“You’ll probably have a cesarean section because you have small feet.” -OB

Share Button
  
 September 20, 2009  Cesarean, OB 7 Responses »
Sep 202009
 

“A moderate bikini wax or shave can keep things clean and fresh ‘down there.’ This is one of the best pieces of advice you will get before delivery.” -OB on her website, advertising her “spa services” for expectant and postpartum women

Share Button
  
 September 20, 2009  OB 16 Responses »
Sep 192009
 

“You had a $500 response to a $5 problem.” ~Midwife after mother told her about trauma memories during her home birth.

Share Button
  
 September 19, 2009  Birth Trauma, Midwife 3 Responses »
Sep 192009
 

“You can’t deliver on hands and knees because that is backwards…and it will confuse the baby.” -L&D Nurse

Share Button
  
 September 19, 2009  L&D Nurse, pushing 13 Responses »