“Maybe if you weren’t getting so busy, this wouldn’t keep happening.” – Reproductive specialist after a patient’s fifth miscarriage. The doctor was referencing the amount of sex that the woman and her husband were having, approximately 2-3 times a week. Ultimately it was determined that the woman had an abnormality of the cervix and would never be able to carry a pregnancy to term.
“I could send you in for testing, but honestly your miscarriages are obstetrically boring.” – OB to childless woman at the follow-up visit two weeks after her most recent miscarriage, when the woman asked why she was having repeat miscarriages and if there was anything she could do to stop them happening in the future.
“You need to get over it and move on.” – OB to mother at a postpartum visit. The mother was a bit “spacey” and out of it. The mother had lost her baby in a cord accident during birth.
“Your baby doesn’t look good.” – Radiologist to mother and father during a routine ultrasound on a Friday afternoon. The following Monday at a regular OB appointment hey learned that the baby had died several weeks before.
“You can get pregnant, so there’s nothing I can do for you. If you were having infertility problems that would be a different story.” – Reproductive Endocrinologist to mother who had been sent by her OB after her 3rd unexplained miscarriage in a row.
“You’re going to lose this baby anyways.” – Perinatologist to mother who had come in for an early pregnancy check up after 2 miscarriages. Heartbeat was 106 and the perinatologist wanted it to be 110.
“You’re causing this by continuing to nurse your toddler.” – OB to mother being seen for her third recurrent miscarriage.
“No, you don’t understand. Because you had a past miscarriage you WILL have postpartum depression and won’t be able to bond with your son properly. If you’d like, I can refer you to a psychiatrist to prescribe you medication when you get discharged.” – Midwife to mother who had lost a previous baby.
“Tell her to suck it up.” – OB anesthesiologist regarding a mother who asked for an epidural near the end of her incredibly painful induction to deliver her stillborn baby.
“Babies know when they’re not wanted. Once you’re really ready, it’ll work.” – OB to mother experiencing her second miscarriage.