“If I can’t check you, I’m taking no responsibility for what position the baby is in.” – OB to mother at 37 week prenatal who was refusing a vaginal exam.
“Don’t be shocked, I’m a bit more generous than the female OBs.” – Male OB to mother just prior to a vaginal exam.
“If you think that hurts, then you’re definitely going to need an epidural.” – OB during a prenatal vaginal exam.
“Open wide. Say Meow!” – Gyn to woman as the Gyn inserted a speculum for a PAP smear.
“…And now I’m stripping your membranes.” – OB in response to mother’s statement that she was feeling pain during a 40 week appointment cervical exam.
“Lucky she has an epidural!” – OB after performing a vaginal exam that was so intense it moved the mother’s body up toward the head of the bed.
“Oh honey, don’t put your hand in there. Your vagina is dirty. Only I can can check your cervix without causing an infection.” – L&D nurse to mother who wanted to check her own cervix.
“I’m not sure how you small girls give birth…wait, you should have plenty of room in THERE for the baby.” – OB to mother doing a pelvic exam at 12 weeks of pregnancy.
OB: ” You’re finally 5 centimeters! Let’s get you your
Mother: “I don’t want an epidural.”
Doctor: “Oh, you will.”
“Ten more seconds.” – OB to mother who stated three times that she wanted the doctor’s hands removed and the vaginal exam to stop.