“You can’t!  At a home birth we wouldn’t be able to monitor you, and if you have a rupture you will die. And your baby will die. (turns to husband…) And you will be a widower.” – OB to mother who was discussing her desire to have a home birth after a cesarean.

51 people dislike these words.

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“I hate this stupid machine.” – ER nurse when an Electronic Fetal Monitor stopped detecting a heartrate. The nurse then turned down the machine instead of trying to find reposition the equipment to pick up the heartbeat.

39 people dislike these words.

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“You are 100% welcome to attempt a natural birth, but you will be checked every 2 hours and have constant fetal monitoring, and if labor lasts longer than 12 hours we’ll start pitocin.” – OB to mother.

57 people dislike these words.

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“Now, this is the CTG machine… I don’t know what that stands for!”  - Midwife while conducting a tour of the L&D unit.

34 people dislike these words.

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“No you can’t stand up. And don’t move like that, you’re moving the monitor! We can’t tell how the baby is doing!” – L&D Nurse to mother in labor.

51 people dislike these words.

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“Was there still a heartbeat during the ultrasound?” – OB to mother at an OB appointment, while looking for fetal heart tones.  The mother had her OB appointment immediately after an ultrasound.

47 people dislike these words.

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“You can wait, my patient is unhappy and I am going to make her happy before you continue. She comes first, if she is stressed, the baby could be stressed. You will wait.” – L&D nurse asking the Anesthesiologist to wait, when the mother became concerned that she could no longer hear the baby’s heartbeat and the nurse needed time to reposition the monitor.

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“If something went wrong and your baby died you’d never forgive yourself, would you. Let’s get this monitor on.” – Midwife to mother who inquired about the need for continuous fetal monitoring.

59 people dislike these words.

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“Hmm, she doesn’t like that position.  Why don’t you try lying on your other side.” – Midwife to mother calmly and quietly when the baby’s heart rate drastically dipped during labor.

4 people dislike these words.

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“But you can still have ‘natural birth’ if you want.” – OB to mother, after explaining how a mandatory IV, artificial rupture of membranes, internal monitoring and manual exploration of the uterus after birth are all required in order to VBAC.

61 people dislike these words.

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