“Your cervix will melt open like butter this time!” – Midwife to a mother after the mother expressed fear that her second labor would be like her first 38 hour labor.

3 people dislike these words.

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“We should induce next week because your cervix is looking old.” – OB to mother.

60 people dislike these words.

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“…And now I’m stripping your membranes.” – OB in response to mother’s statement that she was feeling pain during a 40 week appointment cervical exam.

71 people dislike these words.

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“The floor is too full, this is taking too long. Let me hold open your cervix while you push.” – Certified Nurse Midwife to mother in labor.

84 people dislike these words.

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“You have a beautiful cervix. When you’re looking at a lot of women’s cervices all day there are some really ugly ones!” – Nurse Practitioner to mother during a pap smear.

43 people dislike these words.

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“Oh, you didn’t want that done? Oh well, I’m finished now.” – Midwife to mother who had not consented to having her membranes stripped.

92 people dislike these words.

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“After active labor (4 cm), we typically look for a dilation of about 1.5 cm an hour” – OB when asked what the hospital’s definition of “failure to progress” was.

63 people dislike these words.

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“Why?  Just in case you’re dilated to 5cm?” – OB to mother who requested a cervical exam at the pre-op appointment the day before her scheduled cesarean.

51 people dislike these words.

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“20-25% of women can’t dilate to 10cm” – OB during the follow-up visit of a new mother who had a cesarean section.

66 people dislike these words.

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“Oh!  That isn’t a cervix, it’s an anus.” – OB announcing an undiagnosed breech to a mother in labor.

35 people dislike these words.

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