“You should get the epidural now, because you’re going to need one eventually and since you went to a birth center, and um….well, you know what they say? Birth plans equal cesarean section. – OB to mother who was transferred from a birth center to a hospital after her membranes had been ruptured for over 24 hours.

45 people dislike these words.

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“I hate pitocin and I think episiotomies are evil.” – OB to mother during 34 week prenatal to discuss birth preferences.

2 people dislike these words.

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“We can monitor you as much or as little as you want. You can walk anywhere you want, eat what you want. I’d rather you have energy for the delivery than just drink water. I’ve delivered a baby from just about any position you can think of so whatever you’re comfortable with is what we’ll do. If you want to birth on the toilet we’ll work it out. When you leave after this birth you’ll have had such a good experience you’ll want 10 more children!” – OB to mother at a prenatal visit while discussing birth preferences.

2 people dislike these words.

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“I don’t know what the problem is with you moms. You want the whole neighborhood there. You want the room to smell a certain way. You want music playing. What’s it matter HOW the kid gets here? In the end you’re alive, baby is alive, that’s all that matters.” – OB to mother while discussing the mother’s birth wishes.

69 people dislike these words.

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“I can tell you right now this isn’t going to happen. Birth never goes according to a plan and my only job is to get your baby out. I’ll put it in your file though, maybe someone in L&D will want to read it.” – OB to mother at a prenatal appointment when the mother wanted to discuss her birth preferences.

56 people dislike these words.

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“I don’t know why you are scared of pitocin, it doesn’t make labor more difficult.  It is the same amount of pain and a shorter labor.” – OB to mother while discussing birth plans.

64 people dislike these words.

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“Eating during labor… I don’t think we can do that. But you can have a lollipop.” – OB to mother while reading birth plan.

37 people dislike these words.

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“You can plan for a natural birth if you want, but it’s been my experience that women who do that have the worst karma. They have trouble through their whole pregnancy” – MD to mother expressing interest in a less medicalized setting for her birth.

57 people dislike these words.

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“I don’t like those, because you will fall off it and hurt yourself.” – OB to mother while going over the birth plan, where the mother indicated she wanted to use a birth ball in labor.

47 people dislike these words.

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“We read your birth plan. It was cute.” – Doctor working with a laboring mother having an unplanned cesarean.

68 people dislike these words.

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