Posted by My OB said WHAT?!?.
Feb
7
Posted by My OB said WHAT?!?.
Thoughtful Thursday! “…I Don’t Know Either.”
“You don’t want to know? Then I’m not going to look for it in your chart, so I don’t know either.” – OB to mother after the mother said she didn’t know and didn’t want to know the sex of her baby before delivery.
There are 16 comments to this post.
Dawn Lewis had this to say,
Feb 7, 2013 @ 9:48 am (Quote)
My midwife says this too. It’s awesome to be able to announce the sex of the baby our selves at the birth.
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My husband and I decided to be surprized, too. But I’m due in a month and we still haven’t decided on who will announce it to us and how that will work…. should I ask the midwife just to put the baby on my chest and I announce? Should my husband watch as the baby is born and tell me? Should we let the midwife announce? How did everyone else do it??
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Krista Reply:
February 7th, 2013 at 12:07 pm (Quote)
Honestly, we weren’t thinking about the sex of our kids at the birth, we were just trying to get through the labor. In both instances baby was in my arms for a bit before the midwives asked what they were.
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Niamh Reply:
February 7th, 2013 at 2:06 pm (Quote)
We were so elated to have a healthy baby and I was so darned happy that the contractions were over that everyone forgot to even check. A while after birth, my midwife asked me whether the baby was a boy or a girl, and it was then that I realized that we still didn’t know and I checked. (I am sure the midwife already knew the gender, she just wanted me to know too and noticed that no one had looked cause the baby was still swaddled.)
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Heather P Reply:
February 8th, 2013 at 9:03 pm (Quote)
I wish that we had worked it out in advance with our midwives. They didn’t announce but they did use feminine pronouns when describing the baby. My husband was so caught up in the emotion of seeing his child born that he forgot about the gender altogether. I looked and announced but everybody except my husband knew at that point.
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Holly Reply:
March 7th, 2013 at 9:53 pm (Quote)
For this pregnancy, my five year old (who will be a few months shy of six when baby arrives) has requested to announce. I’m not sure if we will be able to hold off finding out but whether we do or not, I want him to be able to look and announce when baby arrives. If something happens and this is not a possibility at birth, I plan to hold off on announcing gender publicly to family, friends or facebook until HE gets his chance to check it out 
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I love this.
A friend of mine didn’t want to know the sex of her last baby. She made it very clear and they even wrote “do not reveal gender” on her chart.
But during the last OB visit her doctor said, “I don’t think you’ll be here at your next appointment. I bet anything this little girl comes out by the weekend.”
Talk about a major buzzkill. I think it’s awesome that this doc didn’t peek so he couldn’t accidentally let it slip.
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Why is it in the chart in the first place? If the parents didn’t want to know, the ultrasound tech wouldn’t have checked, would they? Or is this another strange US thing that I’ll never understand? 
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Steph in Lex Reply:
February 7th, 2013 at 6:07 pm (Quote)
I’ve always wondered this myself. How is it relevant medical information that MUST be recorded if the parents don’t want to know?
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Steph in Lex Reply:
February 7th, 2013 at 6:07 pm (Quote)
Oh–and yes, they always look and record it whether the parents want to know or not.
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My OB made it clear that IF we wanted to know, tell the ultrasound tech. If we didn’t ask, we weren’t going to be told. The techs also asked (with both kids) if we wanted to know. They don’t put the sex of the baby in the charts at my OBGYN’s either btw.
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Odontivatroda had this to say,
Mar 18, 2013 @ 11:19 am (Quote)
When I originally commented I clicked the -Notify me when new comments are added- checkbox and now each and every time a comment is added I get 4 emails with the same comment. Is there any way you’ll be able to eliminate me from that service? Thanks!
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What a nice, supportive doc! Hopefully they were nice and supportive for the rest of pregnancy and birth as well.
My midwife was thrilled when I didn’t find out the sex of our baby. She likes the surprise, both for her own pregnancies, and her patients’ pregnancies. She made it clear that she would not announce the gender at birth, that we would get to find out ourselves.
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