Jan 282013
 

“If God had intended you to give milk, He would have made you a cow!” – OB to mother at a prental visit when the mother shared she would be breastfeeding.

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 January 28, 2013  breastfeeding, OB, prenatal  Add comments

  47 Responses to ““If God Had Intended You To Give Milk, He Would Have Made You A Cow!””

  1. Um… Or a mammal…
    You’d think a doctor would’ve had to get through at least 4th grade level biology…

    • I was thinking the same thing. This OB’s comment is so full of DERP.

    • Or third grade logic.

      But seriously, how much LA LA LA BEWBZ ARE FER GUYZ do you have to have circulating in your brain in order to go through years of medical school without retaining any knowledge (surely imparted at some point . . . right?) of the composition of human breast tissue?

  2. If God had intended you to help human women become mothers, he would have given you the ablity to comprehend that we are *mammals*… which make all make milk. Not just cows, deary.

  3. God did intend me to give milk…that’s why my breasts make it after I have a baby…why is this confusing again?

  4. Then why did I develop breasts during puberty? And why am I producing milk after giving birth to my baby? Guess my breasts are just for show, huh?
    *Honestly where do these OBs get their info Nestlé? Sheesh!

  5. Instead, God made me a mammal which means I’m supposed to feed my babies with… Wait for it… Milk! Produced by my own mammary glands. This OB clearly flunked basic biology.

  6. Please tell me this quote is from the 50s.

    ….please….

  7. Because cows are the ONLY members of the mammalian class.

    You know what you call the guy who graduated last in his class in medical school? “Doctor”.

  8. So, how easy are those board exams, anyway?

    If you can be this stupid and still earn an MD, we all need to be switching careers and addressing the American doctor shortage, pronto.

    • You know what they call the person graduating from medical school at the very BOTTOM of his class? The one who had to repeat classes so he could pull a failing grade up to a C- just so he could scrap by and earn a degree?

      Doctor.

      Too bad that the Doc’s GPA isn’t on all those diplomas he hangs all over his office and exam rooms.

  9. “Well clearly SOMEONE intended me to make milk, because I have all this equipment…”

  10. “STUPID! YOU SO STUPID!” – UHF

  11. “Then why on Earth was I given breasts?”

  12. Right on! If God intended you to give milk, he would have given you the physical characteristics necessary for that! He would have given you a body part that beings producing and dispensing milk after you give birth!

    Since God clearly did not give human women any body part that functions like that, we should not breastfeed!

    /sarcasm

  13. That is, hands down, the stupidist thing I have ever heard. God did intend us to make milk, that is why he made us MAMMALS. We all make milk for our babies, this is not exclusive to cows!!

  14. So what exactly am I supposed to give? Pre-chewed bird seed from my crop?

  15. Why are there OB’s so against breastfeeding? It’s absurd. OB’s are just another form of politicians. Saying what people what them to say to make that extra money. I find it hard to believe that a doctor really thinks that.

  16. Um human milk is designed for human babies. Cow milk is for cow babies

  17. Yeah… if *god* intended you to make milk for the whole family, then maybe. But actually…? No. what a freaking stupid comment! Did that person think whales are fish, too? :P Major biology fail, logic fail, and human competence in health care sector fail.

    When standing in front of people who say “gems” like that, I just want to stare blankly and start dancind the Time Warp.

  18. Yeah… if *god* intended you to make milk for the whole family, then maybe (besides the fact that cown usually make milk for calves and not humans). But actually…? No. what a freaking stupid comment! Did that person think whales are fish, too? :P Major biology fail, logic fail, and human competence in health care sector fail.

    When standing in front of people who say “gems” like that, I just want to stare blankly and start dancing the Time Warp (Rocky Horror Picture Show).

  19. Sorry for the double post, comment didn’t show up when refreshing the page and was still in the comment box. I wish you could edit and delete comments here. :|

  20. Wow, I’m assuming based on my own experiences that this doctor is actually a dinosaur. Those aren’t mammals. ;-)

  21. Funny, i had a conversation about mammals with a 6 yr old last week, and she figured out that if a mammal is an animal with hair on its body, has live young and makes milk, then people are mammals.

    so… i think i’d rather have that 6 yr old as my dr.

    • My two year old pointed out that the cow had “nursings” just like mommy and that they were for the cow babies. We also noticed them on the pig and our dog. But it all comes back to me. The cow makes milk just like mommy, not the other way around.

  22. I teach 4 year old kindergarten. I’m pretty sure 75% of my students could tell this doctor why that is absurd. Granted, my students are awesome, but I would expect just a leeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeettle bit more from someone who I am entrusting with my pregnancy.

  23. Does this person also believe that my breasts are only intended for the pleasure of my partner? Grr.

  24. Uh, so where does the line start for cow’s milk? Since by this doc’s logic, the only mammal on the planet that makes milk, is cows. And that means every other animal, including the largest creature currently on earth (the blue whale) would have to stand in line for their babies to nurse from cows.

    Can you see it, doc? A year old blue whale calf suckling from a cow? No? That’s how stupid it is to imply that cow’s milk is the ONLY possibility for a HUMAN baby.

  25. Okay. Reaching for far straws again, but any chance that this was a female OB with wrong sense of feminism, who had the “mom = milk bar = like a cow” comments in mind? Not that it would excuse anything, but I can not imagine that someone would seriously reach a doctorate without grabbing the mammal concept. IT CAN NOT BE. Looking forward to the pink link once again.

  26. Shall I start quoting the Bible with references to nursing and weaning.

  27. Goodness, Doctor, you’re right! And if God wanted me to give birth I’d have been given a vagina! Oh, wait…

  28. And if God had intended to give you common sense…well, He must have skipped you for a reason.

  29. I will admit there were times with my first son when I felt like, if I got down on all fours, I would have been a walking kindergarten field trip. (Pumping can feel a little like being a cow.) However, that does not mean I’m a cow.

  30. This is mine, but it was said to my mother’s best friend in 1967.

    My mother and K were pregnant at the same time. Mom, being somewhat…different from her peers talked to K about breastfeeding. K, being more typical, had to “run it by” her OB, and this is what she got. Needless to say, she ended up formula feeding.

    To be fair, though, I don’t think it was the OB’s “advice” that decided her. This woman put her crying two-month old baby in the car, because she was disrupting their dinner. In the middle of August. In Iowa. I don’t think the pediatrician advised that.

    She thought Mom was ridiculous for running out to the car every few minutes.

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