Posted by My OB said WHAT?!?.
Jan
5
Posted by My OB said WHAT?!?.
“Women Prefer Having Cesarean Sections To Avoid Vaginal Changes.”
“Women prefer having cesarean sections to avoid vaginal changes.” – OB to mother at a postpartum check up, when the mother expressed emotion around having a cesarean for a suspected macrosomic baby that measured only 8 pounds.
There are 37 comments to this post.
That makes me think of the anti-smoking commercial I saw the other day. The narrator said that a tobacco executive was told that smoking was linked to low birth weights.
His reply?
“I think women would prefer smaller babies.”
So I can believe that a jerkwaffle of a doctor said this.
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Fantasy reply: “I don’t care what women prefer. I am this woman and I am upset about my cesarean section and don’t want you to dismiss it for shallow reasons. Now talk.”
Dawn, I’m sorry you were brushed off like that by your doctor.
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Jense Reply:
January 5th, 2013 at 4:39 pm (Quote)
I’d be more upset at ABDOMINAL changes and a scar I didn’t ask for rather than changes in a vaginal structure which is DESIGNED to stretch.
It’s like they ascribe one standard for all women and when you’re a women that deviates from that, suddenly they can treat you how THEY want for being this sort of anti-woman.
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Really? Really?! tell that to me! im 30 weeks pregnant as of tomorrow, had two unnecessary c-sections that resulted in PTSD from medical mistreatment, and traumatic recoveries, and am fighting tooth and nail at this very moment to get my VBA2C. FU-OB!!!
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Mandie Reply:
January 6th, 2013 at 11:23 am (Quote)
Good Luck! Stay strong and have excellent support!! (Doula maybe?)
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TyMc Reply:
January 7th, 2013 at 9:24 am (Quote)
Thank you both 
The nurses are trying everything they can to get me to consent to a c-section (i say nurses because i have only seen 1 doctor once in all the 30 weeks so far). They even told me i have a “uterine window” which they conveniently didn’t tell me about until 3 days ago despite this being my third pregnancy.
I have been in contact with a few different Doula’s throughout my pregnancy, but haven’t hired one because of financial difficulties. They have given me great advice though
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So… I’m not a woman if I don’t agree? Where exactly did you get this info that ‘women’ prefer C-sections? I’m sitting here… telling you that *I* did not want a c-section and you gave me one without a decent *medical* reason. You think I care what the vote you took decided I was ‘supposed’ to want?
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Susan Peterson had this to say,
Jan 5, 2013 @ 5:10 pm (Quote)
Why do I think it is *men* who prefer this?
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Mama Wrench had this to say,
Jan 5, 2013 @ 5:25 pm (Quote)
“I guess I have secret testicles, then, because I’m unhappy with my cesarean section. Since I — not ‘women’ — am your patient, how about addressing my concerns?”
Sadly, I can’t even assume the OB was male. I’ve met female OBs with the same opinion about vaginal birth — thinking about Dr Lisa and her notorious misrepresentations of vaginal birth — that really, it’s just a medical culturation of birth, rather than a male culturation of birth.
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SculptorAlison had this to say,
Jan 5, 2013 @ 6:08 pm (Quote)
I would much prefer a vaginal birth,no matter what size my baby happens to be, than to risk an infection and death like what happened to my dear friend after a “normal,routine c-section” just 2 weeks ago. Not to mention being severely limited on my family size because of the risks in repeated sections. Having insurance companies refuse to cover maternity care because c-sections are considered a pre-existing condition, oh and a longer recover time
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According to my husband, nothing changed down under so…
And the idea of a c-section scares the living daylight’s out of me so no, thanks.
Occasionally I hear from women who prefer a c-section because they’re afraid of being all stretched out after, or tear/be cut during their babies’ birth, but it certainly isn’t the norm doc.
[Reply]
Mama Wrench Reply:
January 6th, 2013 at 5:39 am (Quote)
My husband claims I shrank back to an… erm… “premarital” proportion after having a vaginal birth.
I have a very dear friend who is terrified of getting pregnant — actually refuses to have children — because when she was younger, the women in her family told her horror stories about what happens to your vagina when you have children, hoping it would keep her from having premarital sex. Makes me wonder how much of that was based on their own experiences with “modern” medical management of birth.
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Really? We’d PREFER major abdominal surgery, its recovery, and all the risks and difficulties that come with it (not to mention having to care for a newborn with a giant abdominal wound to recover from)??? Um, no.
This reminds me of the orthopedic surgeon I saw last fall who diagnosed my severe hip dysplasia and told me I needed total hip replacement in both hips (only solution to the extreme hip/leg/back pain I’ve been having for years). I wanted to know if I should have them replaced before or after I have children, and she said that either was ok, but I’d have trouble delivering vaginally since the damage/extra bony growths limited my range of motion. But, that’s ok, she said, because “a c-section isn’t the end of the world.” Um, it was to ME. I don’t want to have to have a c-section (in other words MORE major surgery) just because I can’t spread my legs very wide, I assume for a traditional epidural and stranded beetle position for delivery. Women can deliver in squatting or standing positions that don’t require too much range of motion in the hips. I’m getting the hips done before I get pregnant, but even if I still don’t have much range of motion afterward, I know there are other options to automatic major abdominal surgery! 
) I hope the OP gets all the support she needs to recover from the trauma she’s experienced. We’ll be here for ya too!!
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My vaginal delivery only improved things for me. I suffered from untreated vaginismus (because no doctor ever believes you when you tell them you think you have a problem) and sadly endured years of painful sex as a result. Since having my daughter, I haven’t had any more problems and I can finally enjoy sex with my husband. Sometimes a stretched out vagina is a good thing.
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Well, Doc if our choices are a 2nd-3rd or 4th degree episiotomy with tear or a c-section then you might have a point. OTOH if you pull your head out of your a$$ and realize that non-surgical birth IS an option then you might just realize how much damage you are doing in the name of saving women from the dangerous natural process!
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So many sarcastic comments come to mind but I’ll skip them and say this instead:
This is one of the things that hurts my heart the most about the OB mindset. There are so many women that are not educated in how their bodies were designed to work! God created our body to birth babies and the majority of the time, it can happen without interference. One of my biggest regrets of my spinal cord injury is that I’m not longer able to work with women and help them birth their babies naturally. I wish I could find a way to educate people, to guide women! It doesn’t have to be like this!
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I have given birth vaginally twice and seen no changes in my vagina. It’s not “loose” or whatever it is that people think happens to them during childbirth. I don’t understand why people think that. Also, it’s clear the OP would have preferred any vaginal changes to the trauma she clearly suffered from the c-section. I’m sorry, OP, for your terrible experience.
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Thanks for the share! I was so upset at my follow up appointment after having a c-section I didnt need. During some forced small talk with the doctor I was looking for a sorry I made a mistake instead I got that response almost like the doctor had done me and my vagina a favor.
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Steph in Lex Reply:
January 5th, 2013 at 12:11 pm Steph in Lex(Quote)
So disgusting.
I had quite a painful and relatively long recovery from my VBAC but I wouldn’t trade it for another c-section. No way.
I am so sorry that this doctor treated you like that. C-sections are traumatic for a lot of women, and the trauma is compounded when our sometimes-complicated feelings around them get brushed aside like they’re nothing. And not only like they’re nothing–but like you said, the impression that you should be grateful. Yeah, thanks for the major abdominal surgery and permanent scar, not to mention being treated as “high risk” for subsequent pregnancies if I don’t want to just go ahead and schedule another c-section.
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Blue Reply:
January 5th, 2013 at 2:13 pm Blue(Quote)
Wow, I’m sorry you were treated that way, in regards to both the unnecessary c-section and the horrendous bedside manner afterward. I’ve never had a c-section, but I have had major abdominal surgery for other reasons, and let me tell you, I’d take “vaginal changes” any day over surgery. And that is coming from someone who still has residual vaginal pain from her first birth five years ago. Because, you know what, the lingering “changes” from my abdominal surgery are far more bothersome than those from my vaginal births.
But, of course, we’re supposed to just dread any “damage” to our breasts or genitalia that might make them less awesomely sexy, since clearly that is our most important function as women – being the keepers of awesomely sexy breasts and vaginas. So, thanks doc, for keeping my vagina intact! (sarcasm, eye roll, vomit)
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