Nov 3

“…The Doctor Is Not In Charge, The Nurses Are.”

“You will get an epidural. You will only have two people in the room. And the doctor is not in charge, the nurses are.” – L&D nurse when mother was in early labor.

54 people dislike these words.

There are 25 comments to this post.

Pepper had this to say, Nov 3, 2012 @ 2:44 pm (Quote)

I hope you made an escape from this bitch.

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Alexis G had this to say, Nov 3, 2012 @ 3:02 pm (Quote)

Although this is totally NOT FUNNY, the first thing that popped into my head was to pat the nurse on the head and say, “awe, you’re adorable!” in the most condescending way. It just reminded me of Plankton (from Spongebob) trying to rule the town, yet he is so tiny that no one listens.

Too bad this was said by a real person. I hope you ran!

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Heather P had this to say, Nov 3, 2012 @ 3:11 pm (Quote)

I think that if this was said to me in early labor I’d have fled the hospital.

“You will get an epidural” WTF? Are they going to hold her down against her will and force one on her? An anesthesiologist can’t hit a moving target.

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mel had this to say, Nov 3, 2012 @ 3:30 pm (Quote)

Thanks for warning me. Bye now.

OP, I hope you ran. In early labor, if it were me, I’d be on my way to anywhere but there.

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Gemma had this to say, Nov 3, 2012 @ 3:42 pm (Quote)

My only reply at least in my head would have to be “and you will f*** right off!”

What a bitch!!! A jumped up one at that!

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Carrie had this to say, Nov 3, 2012 @ 3:49 pm (Quote)

This sounds scarily similary to the “twilight sleep” era of L&D… Treating all patients like a slab of meat, put on the conveyor belt, just make sure you’re a good little patient and don’t give the nurses any trouble and they won’t be mean to you.

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jenni had this to say, Nov 3, 2012 @ 4:15 pm (Quote)

i would have left. the next hospital is only 45 minutes away here, and i could handle that more than this gem.

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Jespren had this to say, Nov 3, 2012 @ 4:46 pm (Quote)

I don’t curse, but I think a big “F you!” Would be appropriate here, followed by a demand to see the head nurse or hospital orsbudsman.

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Megan had this to say, Nov 3, 2012 @ 4:56 pm (Quote)

“Actually I think I’m the one in charge of what will happen to my body, Thank you very much!”

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Kasondra had this to say, Nov 3, 2012 @ 5:13 pm (Quote)

“I do not consent.”

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Ash had this to say, Nov 3, 2012 @ 5:21 pm (Quote)

My baby, my vagina, my uterus, my spine, I’M in charge

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Tee had this to say, Nov 3, 2012 @ 6:01 pm (Quote)

This one sends chills down my spine. I cannot fathom the amount of arrogance and entitlement it must take for a nurse to say something like this! And exactly how are they going to place an epidural on a woman that doesn’t consent? Last time I checked, you have to be still for an epidural and I would most certainly not be holding still if that was happening against my will!

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Toni Reply:
November 4th, 2012 at 5:59 am Toni(Quote)

This! And really, it’s the anesthesiologist’s call long before it’s the nurse’s call (even if we could get beyond it being up to the mother!). The nurse can call in the anesthesiologist without the mother’s consent (a b*&^% move, but they could theoretically do it). But the anesthesiologist will want you to sign a consent form and agree to it (not to mention hold still for it) and if the mother says no, i don’t consent, then he/she will leave – nurse be damned.

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Kristin had this to say, Nov 3, 2012 @ 9:22 pm (Quote)

Uh, can I get an AMA form please?
So I can get back in my car and drive the 209 minutes to the other hospital?

Strike that, I’ll just go home and do it myself.

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Kristin Reply:
November 3rd, 2012 at 9:31 pm Kristin(Quote)

20, not 209.

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Jessica Reply:
November 4th, 2012 at 9:44 pm Jessica(Quote)

With a nurse like that, I think I’d make a 209-mile trip!

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Mama Wrench had this to say, Nov 4, 2012 @ 6:04 am (Quote)

“Please print out a copy of the patients’ bill of rights for me to review. While you’re there, print one out for yourself — and get me another nurse.”

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himom had this to say, Nov 4, 2012 @ 8:07 am (Quote)

Oh, can you repeat that for the camera, please? I am sure that the doctors, the charge nurse, the hospital administrators will all be interested to hear what you have to say.

Honestly, after picking up my jaw from the floor, I would have shoved her out the door so fast she would have hit the wall on the other side.

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Brittany had this to say, Nov 4, 2012 @ 7:44 pm (Quote)

Okay stupid first time mom over here getting panicky but what if this actually happens to me?? What do you do in this situation. My doctor only delivers at one hospital but there are literally 3 other hospitals within about 20 minutes of the one I’ll be at. Can I just leave my doctor high and dry like that after signing forms and crap saying id be with him through out the pregnancy?? I’m just worried about the legality and billing of the situation honestly… But I also don’t want to be treated like an idiot in the hospital..

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Ash Reply:
November 4th, 2012 at 7:59 pm Ash(Quote)

Yes sweetie, you CAN just leave. A hospital is like having your nails done, if you don’t like the job they’re doing or the attitude of the person working with you, just fire them and leave. They can’t bill you for services they didnt provide and if they try, report them to your insurance. Make sure everything they do is truly medically based (not just for convenience) and insist they give you time to research risks/benefits of everything they try to push on you. Insist on informed consent. You’d rather be an annoying patient than a c-sectioned sheep

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Brittany Reply:
November 4th, 2012 at 8:33 pm Brittany(Quote)

Haha thank you for the reassurance. I just don’t want to screw myself or something >_< I know it sounds dumb but I over think everything. I love my doctor but I am terrified of getting a super ridiculous nurse. I feel better now though!

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Ash Reply:
November 4th, 2012 at 8:50 pm Ash(Quote)

No worries. This is where having a doula comes in handy. If a doula isn’t possible, make sure you’re never without a witness and take a laptop or smartphone with internet access to be able to research on the fly. Better to be over informed than run over.

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Ash Reply:
November 4th, 2012 at 9:43 pm Ash(Quote)

Btw, I meant no offense by calling you sweetie. I live in the south so it’s kinda habit to type, sorry if it offended. Good luck and congrats.

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annette had this to say, Nov 8, 2012 @ 5:44 am (Quote)

Sorry this slipped past me in my inbox. Needless to so I freaked out and cried. At that time I did not know what I know now. This nurse was also pissed because I had a doula. My mom reported to my doctor and she was “reminded” of her job duties and warned if anything else happened she would be fired on the spot.

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