Dec 12

“You’re Not Going To Bathe Her? You Want Her To Be All Dirty?”

“You’re not going to bathe her? You want her to be all dirty?” – Postpartum nurse to mother who declined the newborn bath.

47 people dislike these words.

There are 29 comments to this post.

Bonita had this to say, Dec 12, 2011 @ 11:02 am (Quote)

Vernix=/= dirty. I didn’t bathe my ydd until she wa sa week old and she smelled so good!

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Katie Reply:
December 12th, 2011 at 11:06 am Katie(Quote)

I think I got the bloody crusty bits off, and that was about it. None of them were dirty, and certainly smelled better than that J&J crap.

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Renai Reply:
December 12th, 2011 at 12:03 pm Renai(Quote)

I was an hbac transfer, and *I* was the one to request to get something to remove the bloody crusty bits from her hair. The nurses were just fine with her how she was, and they and the ped were rubbing the vernix in her!

That pp nurse could learn about the benefits of not taking off the baby’s only moisture from the skin and replacing it with…other stuff.

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Renai Reply:
December 12th, 2011 at 12:06 pm Renai(Quote)

Oh, they did wipe some meconium off her but that was it.

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Miss M had this to say, Dec 12, 2011 @ 11:11 am (Quote)

Our nurse was really freaked out when she came to discharge us and found out that at 2 days old my sweet baby had only been wiped off gently, but never bathed.

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Jane had this to say, Dec 12, 2011 @ 11:15 am (Quote)

“No, and no.”

See, they’re two separate questions, but the nurse stacks them as if answering no to the one implies yes to the other. Answer them separately and it’s just fine. Like, “You’re not going to bathe her? Do you like pickles on your hamburger?” Uncouple them and watch the nurse struggle to figure out what just happened.

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Sheva Reply:
December 12th, 2011 at 12:46 pm Sheva(Quote)

So true! They often lump together non-sequiturs, forcing the mom to see them as one fact, or two related facts, when in truth they are nothing of the sort.
You don’t want monitoring (testing, drugs, c-section)? Do you want your baby to die?!?! It implies that not having these things directly causes DEATH!!!
So mom has to take each sentence separately.

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Les had this to say, Dec 12, 2011 @ 11:17 am (Quote)

Ha! My dd2 would have freaked her out! She was a water birth, no ickiness when she was dried off, so she didn’t get her first bath until she was about a month old.

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Ashley Bean Reply:
December 12th, 2011 at 12:02 pm Ashley Bean(Quote)

I just had a water birth yesterday, but my son’s water never broke and his hair came out icky, but that was it. The MW asked if I wanted them to wash his hair and I told them yes, but they left his skin just the way it was. What little vernix he had absorbed in a few hours and we have no plans of giving him a full bath until he needs it. gotta love water babies huh =]

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Selia had this to say, Dec 12, 2011 @ 11:35 am (Quote)

Was my vagina full of dirt when baby came out? No? How did baby get dirty then? Unless baby is covered in meconium, which I am sure wasn’t the case, and still doesn’t require a bath, bathing a newborn baby to cleanse the skin is about as necessary as douching the vagina to get out all that darn lubrication. It is supposed to be there! (Sure some babies are so covered you might rub them off a bit with a blanket, but that is different than stripping the oils and vernix from their delicate skin with a true bath with washing like they do.)

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Jessica had this to say, Dec 12, 2011 @ 11:39 am (Quote)

When she gets dirty I’ll be happy to bathe her.

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Jessica had this to say, Dec 12, 2011 @ 11:48 am (Quote)

When I declined the bath the nurse said “why?” and I said “because he’s not dirty” and she said “oh, ok!”. So great.

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Jennifer had this to say, Dec 12, 2011 @ 11:58 am (Quote)

I declined the bath and they did it anyway when they bullied me into taking her to the nursery to put her on a warmer when I was stuck in bed after my cesarean. I was told she was cold because she hadn’t had a bath. Total logic fail. So many things I wish I had done differently.

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Cari Reply:
December 12th, 2011 at 4:09 pm Cari(Quote)

yeah, that’s a ridiculous excuse. Baby was probably cold cause she wasn’t cuddled up to mama.

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Anna had this to say, Dec 12, 2011 @ 12:18 pm (Quote)

Ughhhhh. The nurses told me DS was a biohazard for all those nasty fluids on him. Oh well at least they wore gloves at all time when they touched him, hehe. DH bullied me into bathing him though at 3 days. I did not let that happen with DD who didn’t bathe until like 3 weeks!

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Kasondra had this to say, Dec 12, 2011 @ 12:21 pm (Quote)

My midwives told me we could bathe whenever. We gave him a rinse bath the next day to get the bloody bits out of his hair and that was it…

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amelia had this to say, Dec 12, 2011 @ 12:50 pm (Quote)

unless the baby was born into a mud bath I’m not sure where the dirt came from :p

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jessica had this to say, Dec 12, 2011 @ 12:50 pm (Quote)

I had that said to me. The day after my csection my nurse came in and told me ‘you need to get a shower, your dirty’ Um Im sorry but I was in too much pain for a shower. And I never got asked about baths for the babies, they just did it while I was in recovery after my sections.

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Sheva Reply:
December 12th, 2011 at 1:11 pm Sheva(Quote)

Wow. That’s pretty bitchy – you’re dirty??!
At most births I attend the nurses give the mom a sponge bath after the birth. And at one, the doctor did it. (She was one of the nicest doctors I’d ever met. The nurses called her by her first name, and she called the older nurses Miss—.)
After my first hospital birth, nurses didn’t do squat for me – and there was no shower in my room, either!! I had to wait over a day to get a shower – they only had a row of them in the hallway. After my second one (different hospital, preemie, couldn’t have her at home) the nurse helped me to the bathroom and helped me just rinse off in the shower. She was so sweet, based on my first birth, I didn’t believe that nurses could be so nice. I’m sorry you got stuck with a stinker!

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jessica Reply:
December 12th, 2011 at 3:35 pm jessica(Quote)

Luckily she was the only ‘bad’ nurse I had. She also yelled at me for looking at my daughters records and told me I was not allowed to read those. Last time I checked she is MY daughter! And whenever Id ask her for something itd take her forever to respond back to me. I loved the nurse that came in after her she also had csections and understood what I was going through!

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Sheva had this to say, Dec 12, 2011 @ 12:53 pm (Quote)

I don’t either bathe mine, except if there’s meconium or blood, and then it’s just a spot wash. In most hospitals, they get a full scrub down.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?NR=1&v=ePrgHXcRRtU&feature=endscreen

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Heather Reply:
December 13th, 2011 at 7:10 pm Heather(Quote)

OMG, I couldn’t watch the whole thing. That baby’s cry was the cry of a creature believing it was dying. My latest baby didn’t cry for 3 hours after she was born. Her first bath was lying in my arms in a birth pool (I didn’t get to birth in it because she came too fast!). She relaxed totally and just rested there, content, and nursed a bit. That video was a nightmare

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Ella had this to say, Dec 12, 2011 @ 1:16 pm (Quote)

Sheva, That video is in Russian, interesting, it doesn’t hurt them to wash but I remember mind was washed with a cup and sponge or something, she cried I remember too. I don’t know much about baby baths though

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karen had this to say, Dec 12, 2011 @ 1:26 pm (Quote)

That is so sad sheva. I’ve always had nurses help me get cleaned up. One bathed me top to bottom. I stood in the shower and put my energy into staying upright and she washed my whole body, rinsed and dries me off and dressed me. I was so tired, it was so nice to be completely taken care if.

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Kristin had this to say, Dec 12, 2011 @ 1:26 pm (Quote)

Are you going to drop the baby on the floor? In a planter? Vernix is not dirt, nor does it mean the baby is “contaminated” or a “bio-hazard.”

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lilmrsmchenry Reply:
December 13th, 2011 at 5:49 pm lilmrsmchenry(Quote)

She was on the floor? I call 5 second rule!

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Heather Reply:
December 13th, 2011 at 7:10 pm Heather(Quote)

My baby was born on the floor! She still wasn’t dirty

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Jenny Islander had this to say, Dec 12, 2011 @ 2:26 pm (Quote)

Do L&D nurses and OBs train with plastic models or something? My midwife was the gofer for a team of midwives for several months while she was studying for her certification. She learned about the assorted varietes of schmoop that are part of birth and she never once flipped out about it. Dainty people do not belong in the same room with a newborn.

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