Posted by My OB said WHAT?!?.
Dec
9
Posted by My OB said WHAT?!?.
“You Aren’t Allowed To Hold Your Baby Like That Here…”
“You aren’t allowed to hold your baby like that here. If you want to take him somewhere, you need to put him in the bassinet.” – Postpartum Nurse to mother who was walking the halls to comfort her newborn.
There are 64 comments to this post.
AmyAnne had this to say,
Dec 9, 2011 @ 6:34 pm (Quote)
And getting screamed at at 2am that it’s time to feed my sleeping(!) baby, then getting screamed at again because I dozed off while nursing her in bed. Reason #1,728,393 why I was in and out of hospital in less than 20 hours for my last 3 babies. HATE postpartum wing and, well, the hospital too.
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Ashley Reply:
December 9th, 2011 at 6:53 pm (Quote)
Yes! We were home and in bed when my daughter was less than 24 hours old, for these exact reasons. I didn’t need someone loudly telling me to wake up and wake up my baby so she could eat, and telling me I couldn’t carry her around was not okay with me. My daughter’s first birthday is tomorrow 
and it still makes me mad. Next time, we will hopefully be in a state that allows home births.
We were told that it was because we could drop the baby, and that it helped identify someone who was trying to walk off with a baby that wasn’t theirs. (Because a kidnapper would never try to push a baby away in a bassinet….)
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Ryanne Reply:
December 9th, 2011 at 7:04 pm (Quote)
The nurses hated it when I would smile and say, “You write what you need to, this is what I’m going to do.” …and then continue to sleep with my baby, take my own pain meds (usually none at all–*gasp!), etc.
Actually had one 3rd shift older nurse come in and compliment me for sleeping with my daughter. “That’s what you should be doing…but, I didn’t tell you that.”
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Alyssa Reply:
December 10th, 2011 at 8:19 am (Quote)
Aww, Ryanne, you should submit that nice nurses comment for Thoughtful Thursday
I was so fortunate to have a hospital that allowed sleeping with the baby in my arms and very supportive of breastfeeding… but still… after falling asleep for only a few hours and pulling an all-nighter the night before in labor I was still woken up at the crack of dawn. Like you ladies I will be in and out as quickly as possible next time!
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Ami Reply:
December 11th, 2011 at 9:19 am (Quote)
Wow! I, on the other hand, had a nurse come in at 2:00 in the morning and yell at me because baby and I were sleeping in my bed. Grr…. This was the same nurse who gave me an attitude when I insisted that baby would be in the room with me overnight. “Hospital policy” then required that she come in every single freakin’ hour to “check on us.” Mind you, this was for my THIRD baby.
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Yep, I was told that after all 3 of mine too. And then with my 3rd when she was hospitalized at 2 weeks old with a fever, we were in the maternity ward and I couldn’t walk with her then either. Just one more reason I want a home birth if we have another baby!
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Every L&D and postpartum unit I have ever worked has this rule. The usual reason is that it protects infant security. But I haven’t seen any literature that supports that one way or the other.
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Debra Reply:
December 13th, 2011 at 12:57 am (Quote)
I was told it’s for security. It’s much easier for someone to snatch a baby out of a bassinet and then conceal it than it is to wheel a baby out in a bassinet. This is one of those rules that only came into effect in the last few years at the hospitals in my town, along with the locked doors and intercom to get into the maternity unit.
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Last time I checked. A bassinet is incapable of comforting a baby. That’s what human arms are for.
My own anecdotal story. A few hours after my baby’s birth I wandered down the halls, baby in arms, to pour myself a glass of OJ from the kitchenette. A nurse poked her head in and good-naturedly told me she would have brought me OJ if I had wanted it. I smiled and said that I just felt like walking. I also surprized my 85 year old grandmother who was coming in to visit me. I guess her hospital experiences were very different.
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mystic_eye Reply:
December 11th, 2011 at 8:33 am (Quote)
Man I wish. I asked for an ice pack and was told that I shouldn’t have rung the nurse that there were ziplock bags and an ice machine in the kitchenette down the hall.
I pointed out that I had no clue there was a kitchenette because when I had asked for food earlier I was told there was none, anywhere, at this time of night.
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Generally, the mother wears a bracelet with an ID# that matches a bracelet on the baby’s leg, and oftentimes on the bassinet. Now, why the mama-baby match isn’t enough, IDK, but I guess it’s a triple check for security…yet another reason to wish I’d been able to stay home and avoid the hassle. Although, I did tell them my baby stayed with me…like it or not. Actually had one nurse try to wrestle my oldest away from me when she thought I was holding her too much. Ugh.
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Tee Reply:
December 9th, 2011 at 10:09 pm (Quote)
That nurse would have been slapped. Just saying!
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Mama Reply:
December 10th, 2011 at 11:52 am (Quote)
I used to work at a hospital with an L&D unit combined with the NICU that had sensors on the exits. If a baby went through those doors without the mom’s matching bracelet the alarms would sound and the floor would go on auto-lockdown. It was impressive.
The reasoning I was told not to walk the halls with the baby was for liability reasons. If an emergency occurs and nurses are scrambling there is a chance the baby could be dropped and the hospital held liable. or if mom slipped. Just another way to cover their asses.
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Toni Reply:
December 10th, 2011 at 1:21 pm (Quote)
The hospital my first was born in was like that – if the baby came too close to the elevator or stairway the alarms would go off and the whole place would be shut down until they verified that every baby was where he/she was supposed to be (happened once while my DH was getting me lunch 
had to wait quite a while before he could come back up to L&D). The sensor bracelet was only on the baby, and was removed just before discharge. They still wanted you to walk with your baby in the little plastic cage 
in case of slip and falls.
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Robyn Reply:
December 10th, 2011 at 9:11 pm (Quote)
Something similar at the hospital where I birthed my son. All the babies had a sensor on their ankles. If the sensor came close to the doors they would lock so someone wouldn’t be able to take the baby off the floor. If the sensor was removed, you had nurses coming to check the baby.
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I was told that new mothers are falling hazards and if I wanted to walk around the halls, I had to have him in the little bed with wheels.
I don’t understand how I was a falling hazard. I mean, I wasn’t drugged and I don’t have an inner ear problem…
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Angelica Reply:
December 9th, 2011 at 7:50 pm (Quote)
It’s not everyone, but with my second child, I got easily exhausted walking around right after birth. The long trek to the back of CVS to fill my prescription made me winded, for real. Some people react funny to losing a lot of blood.
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Kristin Reply:
December 9th, 2011 at 8:34 pm (Quote)
Okay… I suppose it would be too much to ask for a nurse to walk the halls with you to grab your arm if you start going down?
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Susan Peterson Reply:
December 9th, 2011 at 8:47 pm (Quote)
Yes, it would. If nurses were free to do things like that, they would hire fewer nurses, and then they wouldn’t be. But I think women can be trusted to know if they are safe with their own baby. However, as far as I know, all hospitals in the US have this rule.
If you feel well enough to walk around with your baby I suggest you are well enough to go home! A much better place to be.
But still a problem for those with sick babies who want to comfort them.
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Jessica S. Reply:
December 9th, 2011 at 8:36 pm (Quote)
Not all new moms are fall hazards, but I sure was. I passed out twice from the blood loss.
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road2vba2c Reply:
December 10th, 2011 at 5:49 am (Quote)
Just one of my pet peeves. Sick people walk to the back of the store for medicine, but healthy people get their beer and cigarettes at the front of the store. Marketing I know, but doesn’t make it any more right.
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Kristin Reply:
December 10th, 2011 at 10:00 am (Quote)
It’s also to prevent stealing. By having a couple of employees in the back of the store as well in the front, it’s harder for people to take stuff without getting caught.
I work in a pharmacy, and that’s how it was explained to me. I still think it’s crap, because the ill and elderly have such a hard time getting to the pharmacy and back…
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Knitted in the Womb Reply:
December 10th, 2011 at 10:47 am (Quote)
Handicapped stalls at the rear of the rest room are another of my pet peeves. The handicapped stall–when possible–should be the first stall!
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Rebecca Reply:
December 11th, 2011 at 6:26 am (Quote)
There’s actually a few reasons for this, first the larger size (longer) would mess up the flow of the room. Secondly, its to try to encourage people who don’t need it not to use it. Most people go to the first couple stalls if they’re available.
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Knitted in the Womb Reply:
December 11th, 2011 at 12:05 pm (Quote)
In many bathrooms the handicapped stall is the same depth as the other stalls, it is just wider. Even when it is deeper though…typically then that “jut out” is compensated for by not having a sink directly across from the handicapped stall…so there is still plenty of space around it.
As for people using the first couple of stalls…actually, I read of a study once (our tax dollars at work!) that found that the very first stall is most often skipped in a restroom with many stalls because many people think it would be the most frequently used stall, so they avoid its perceived “germiness” (I use it deliberately because it is the least used). Even if the first stall was the most frequently used…I’d think that would change if the first stall were the handicapped stall because of the higher toilet seat that is often used in handicapped stalls–I’ve been known to wait for a stall to open up rather than using the handicapped stall just because of the height of the seat, and I know that when my kids are little they often resist using the taller toilet even though it would be more convienant for me to be able to take them into the roomier handicapped stall.
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Laura Reply:
December 10th, 2011 at 1:29 pm (Quote)
A lot of new moms are – I was in horrid shape after my first, much better within 24 hours after my second – but then too our local hospital wouldn’t let my HUSBAND walk the halls with our newborn. He had a matching ID too, and no blood loss, pain meds (not that I had pain meds, other than some ibuprofen which was mainly for anti-inflammatory purposes!), etc.
Mostly, I think it makes their lawyers happy. Sigh.
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Cari Reply:
December 11th, 2011 at 8:23 am (Quote)
the more I think about, the more I believe that hospitals were sued when a new parent accidentally dropped their baby, and then accused the hospital of not warning them it would happen. Liability is just so huge now that you can’t say boo without getting sued. This is a side effect of living in a litigious society.
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I was told the same with my first baby, but the birthing suite was big enough for me to walk him around in to soothe him to sleep. They said it was for security reasons and I understood. However, I was quite irritated when one nurse would come in and snatch him at all hours because she was bored on her night shift. My husband actually told her we needed time alone with our baby and she said, “Well he’s so cute I just don’t think I want to put him down”, and kept walking with him! I was home as soon as I could get the paperwork done. With my second baby though the hospital staff was great and made it clear they were just there to help when I requested it, so I was more than happy to stay and be pampered a while : )
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Mercy Reply:
December 11th, 2011 at 11:07 am (Quote)
I had this problem with third. My planned homebirth ended up being a C-section because my kidneys started to fail on me. The night nurse was so bored that when she would come in to get vitals, she would try to take my son so that “I could get my rest”.
I told her that I would sleep much better if he stayed with me.
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buggrit_1979 Reply:
December 11th, 2011 at 12:12 pm (Quote)
It’s nice to know that the nurses you have around you actually like and care about babies… but still– give me my kid, crazy lady!
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Oh, and new moms do fall a lot. It happened to me after I went home from the hospital, and I was too woozy to stand on my own for two hours. Exhaustion, dehydration, and blood loss can do it, even after a drug-free birth. But it sounds like this nurse could have been a bit more gentle in how she explained hospital policies.
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My OB actually hates all (or a lot) of the hospital rules. He has cited this one as an example several times. He said it’s because people have actually dropped their babies in the hospital halls and then sued the hospitals. So the hospitals in order to protect themselves pass a rule that you can’t carry your baby.
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Jennifer Reply:
December 10th, 2011 at 6:20 am (Quote)
Yup, this is it exactly. I am happy to chart “mother denies feeling lightheaded, dizzy, or woozy, is ambulating steadily and independently, has been told that falling while carrying her baby could be dangerous, verbalizes understanding, is walking while carrying baby” because most women do know their own limits and will get back in bed if they feel like they might pass out.
BUT I have had patients fight me and say that they felt just fine thank you, when I had a feeling that they were going to pass out, ignore me, get up, pass out, and then call my supervisor on me for letting them get up. It can very frustrating, and some people are looking for any way to reduce their bill.
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It could’ve been said more nicely, but I don’t see the big deal with this one. My hospital had the same policy, so I either walked in my room with bebe in my arms or walked the halls with him in his little shoebox. I see the risk on their part. Not a huge deal to me.
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You know, I really hate blanket rules, even though I can often understand them. I’ve heard this particular rule with numerous hospitals and every time I question it, I am told that the policy is in place so that people can’t sue if they drop their baby in the hallway.
Now, please do NOT misunderstand what I am about to say here… I am well aware that hospitals like to have dumb policies in place. But I can’t help but wonder if this is the kind of thing that we as a society bring on ourselves because we are “sue happy.” Not that there is any reason that is good enough for a rule of this nature but I just kind of wonder. I think the same thing about the “no co-sleeping in the hospital” rule. It’s dumb but I wonder if it was put in place because one too many babies got hurt and the families sued.
Again, please don’t misunderstand me! I support co-sleeping and I certainly support walking with your own baby! Just my two cents on all of this. And as I so often say, all the more reason to birth at home if at all possible!
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Well, you’re welcome to have that rule, and you’re welcome to document my decision to the contrary. I understand why you have it, but I have different priorities.
Just so we’re clear: as a hospital employee, you are bound by hospital policy; I am not. I choose to observe those guidelines when they are in my best interest, and am glad to help you document my polite refusal if it is ever in my best interest to choose differently. I don’t want to get you in trouble and would be glad to talk to someone higher up to make it clear that you did your duty informing me and encouraging me to follow the “rules”–but later. I’m kinda busy right now. When my baby’s calm and happy, I’d be glad to speak to your supervisor on the floor.
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Christine had this to say,
Dec 9, 2011 @ 11:45 pm (Quote)
Melissa, i work in postpartum/nursery in a hospital with this rule (and all the other rules mentioned) and i would be tempted to kiss any mom who responded like this!! I hate it when the parents let the hospital bully/coerce them into making their first parental decisions! Your response is the one i used when i had my most recent hospital birthed child. “i understand your rules and i will agree you taught them to me – and i will not be complying, thank you!”
Also, i tell all the parents ” the hospital requests that you not walk in the hallway with the baby, and not sleep in the hospital bed with the baby” emphasis on “request!” Because really, who is the parent? Not me!
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buggrit_1979 Reply:
December 11th, 2011 at 12:17 pm (Quote)
If you’re going to be doing that, I hope your hospital has a liability waiver you’re making those moms sign. As several other commenters have pointed out, those rules are in place for a reason.
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Christine Reply:
December 11th, 2011 at 2:02 pm (Quote)
Yup, there is a “Safety Education form” that outlines the hospital rules. They sign that they have been informed. I sign that I informed them.
We probably have a bit of a philosophical, difference, because I believe that “better safe than sorry” is no way to make decisions, and the legal team at the hospital does! From their point of view, no one has sued for “an interrupted BF relationship,” but has sued for “you let me hold my baby while on pain drugs and I dropped him on his head.” I think risks should be evaluated – therefor, if you aren’t on pain meds, and you don’t have significant blood loss, why should you not be allowed to hold your baby while walking in the hall?
Also, litigation on occasion forms policy EVEN when the suit fails – so some moron sues for non-sensical reasons and the legal team makes a new rule EVEN when the party filing suit loses. Because gee, if we change this or restrict that no one else will sue (never mind they lost.) And what does a legal counsel care if this restricts bonding, or BFing, or in general makes parents feel like they have to get the hospital to evaluate their ability to care for their child?
Children and parents have a right to a safe health care experience. True safety advocates will take the time to look into all aspects of the health of the patients, not just short term physical aspects. Long term physical aspects, as well as emotional aspects, are just as important. This is what laboring women are seeking. A positive whole person health experience that doesn’t give a cookie-cutter plan to every woman, on the theory “better safe than sorry!”
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Christine Reply:
December 11th, 2011 at 2:07 pm (Quote)
PS I don’t ever MAKE anyone sign anything. Ever. I explain what I am showing them, why it has a place for their signature, and what their signature means for that form. If they sign, they do it because they choose to. If they don’t, I explain how that impacts their care. “Example: since you don’t want the Heb B vaccine to be given in the hospital, you don’t sign this form, and I won’t give it. I will let the pedi know that we didn’t give it because you didn’t want it.”
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Melissa Reply:
December 11th, 2011 at 12:27 pm (Quote)
Can you come transfer to my hospital so I don’t have to worry about people getting grumpy and huffy with me when I’m not interested in the “rules” after the delivery of my current bun-in-the-oven? (Hmmm…currant buns in the oven…yum…can you tell I’m second trimester? *snicker*)
But seriously. I hope I get some flexible folks taking care of me and little Sammi. Isn’t it all backwards that I’m more nervous about that and not at all nervous about delivery? But that’s the way it is. I’m more worried about having people in the room who understand 1.) I’m KINDA BUSY and 2.) Unless I’m about to die ALWAYS ASK PERMISSION–and don’t do anything unless you have it.
I really like my CNM so far, and my husband is totally behind me on this, but I just want to be free to relax and WORK and not have to worry about protecting myself or baby. The rotten thing is that this is literally the best possible situation, given our location and the scar on my uterus (blah, blah, blah…) but I’m just angry that the “best” option is something that I’m really having to settle for and compromise on.
(O/T rant over!)
Oh, and I could kiss YOU, Christine, for all the good things you’ve done for parents and new babies over the years, with that attitude!
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Mine again.
After a crappy birth experience (see last couple of submissions) they told me my son was jaundiced and I couldn’t go home. I’d already been in hospital for 2 days of labour and was there for 4 days after while they took crazy amounts of blood tests, gave him a heplock to give him antibiotics even though I had antibiotics after my waters had been broken for over 24 hours and put him under the lights.
He wasn’t a great sleeper, its hard to sleep in hospital anyway and I was already exhausted from my 31 hour labour. When my son started crying at 2 or 3am I didn’t want to disturb the other mamas on the ward so I took him to the halls and paced and rocked him. He fell asleep in my arms but every time I stopped rocking or walking he woke up and cried. So after a while I was crying while I was pacing. A nurse started walking over and I thought she was coming to help me because I was obviously distressed.
But she said this.
I told her to go away and leave me alone. Eventually a nicer nurse came and told me I was doing a great job but that she could see I was tired so in order to keep doing a great job I needed to sleep. So she asked my permission to take him for a couple of hours so I could sleep and she’d bring him right back to me if he cried and that she’d sit at the nurses station and give him cuddles. I fed him to fill him up while she sat with me and talked to me and told me I was great at breastfeeding and then she took him. I was a little nervous about being away from him but he was asleep on her and seemed fine. I slept for 3 hours before she brought him back to me. She taught me how to feed him laying down and said she’d pull the curtain round us so she couldn’t see if I’d fallen asleep feeding him because it was againt hospital policy and she didn’t want to have to wake me up.
She was fantastic. If it wasn’t for her I don’t know how I’d have made it through another night in that place. I discharged myself and my son the next day, they wanted to do more blood tests even though my son’s jaundice levels had been normal the last 2 blood tests. They sent a ped to bully me, she told me I could take him home if I wanted a brain damaged baby. I’d had 6 days of their bullying, rudeness and terrible care and totally lost it and demanded they discharge us NOW and asked her how DARE she say something so awful and to get out and sort out the discharge papers. Every time she spoke to me after that all I would say was “get out, discharge us” … and a couple of hours later I was home.
In the complaint letters I wrote to the hospital I mentioned the nice nurse (although I didn’t tell them about her kind of breaking the rules) and told them she was the only member of staff I’d come across in my whole stay there that actually treated me like a human being.
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Laurel Reply:
December 10th, 2011 at 6:14 am (Quote)
I’m so sorry for your experience. That one great nurse, she sounds so amazing! I’m glad you had a real human being with feelings and a heart there to help you.
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Details Reply:
December 10th, 2011 at 2:18 pm (Quote)
I’m so glad you had one wonderful nurse. They make all the difference! The rest of them can jump off a bridge! When I read the quote I was thinking time for mom to go home. Once I’m up enough to be walking the halls with my babies I’m out of there. Sorry you got stuck longer than you needed.
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These ridiculous rules plus the mediocre stay I had in the maternity ward last go-’round is why I requested a 24 hour discharge from my OB. She said she’s on board with it, barring any complications, because she said “I know you have a better support system at home.” I’m sincerely hoping all goes as smoothly as my last birth so I can get the hell out of there as quickly as possible…
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The only time I got to spend with my girls in the hospital was walking them back and forth from the nursery for a feeding and then back again. I HATED it, they were both Combs positive so for 2 days they had them in the light chambers. I understand rules are rules, but I would have liked to have gotten to hold them as I walked the halls instead of just pushing them around in a plastic tub.
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Unfortunately, that really is hospital policy just about everywhere. If you want to take your baby outside your room, they need to stay in that stupid bassinet.
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Melissa Reply:
December 11th, 2011 at 12:31 pm (Quote)
Nope.
The hospital’s lawyers “need” the baby to stay in the bassinet.
I *need* to make sure that my baby gets the best possible care. That might mean the bassinet, if I’m feeling light-headed, or it might mean my arms, if I’m well and baby wants that comfort.
Nurses and other hospital employees may “need” to comply, but that’s about the extent of it.
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My fiance was told this about our DD too because we weren’t allowed to have children under 5 in the hospital room. She has an uncle who is only 4 years older than her so we had to bring her to the waiting room and we weren’t allowed to take her out of the bassinet once in there either! I was appalled it my daughter I just labored and delivered her I should be able to take her any place I please any which way I please!
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Melissa Reply:
December 13th, 2011 at 10:34 am (Quote)
You were “allowed”–but you couldn’t have known that, given the situation. They were lying to you about what you could and could not do with your own daughter.
I’m sorry…that’s horrible. And frightening that they actually seem to *believe* they have the authority to tell a parent whether they may pick up their own child.
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I was told that as well. They told me it was because they weren’t allowed to have newborns carried up the corridors of maternity as it was a workplace health and safety issue with amount of other equipment moving around.
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