Posted by My OB said WHAT?!?.
Oct
22
Posted by My OB said WHAT?!?.
“…I Am *NOT* Touching You Again Until You Get An Epidural.”
“Oh, no! This will *NOT* do! I am *NOT* touching you again until you get an epidural!” – L&D Nurse to mother who cried out from discomfort during a vaginal exam in labor.
There are 26 comments to this post.
Some of us–who have gotten to the point that we no longer expect touch from and interaction with medical professionals to be good, comforting, and healthy–might love this…
but can you imagine what a nasty psychological headlock this throws a different kind of patient into? For a mom who is depending on help and comfort and guidance from her nurse, this is cold, frightening, and manipulative. It sounds an awful lot like:
-I won’t help you
-you’re on your own
-you won’t LET me help you (because there must be something wrong with *you*, it can’t be that I’m doing a VE roughly or in the middle of a contraction or even that VE’s can just plain hurt no matter what while you’re in labor) so when the bad things happen because I can’t help you it will be all your fault.
This one makes me mad.
[Reply]
Jane Reply:
October 23rd, 2011 at 4:45 am (Quote)
Yes, this is a medical threat that puts the woman in the position of either accepting interventions she doesn’t want for the sake of the nurse, or risking an unassisted delivery in the hospital because of the nurse.
As a first-time mom, this wouldn’t have forced me into an epidural, but it would have forced me into silence whenever they hurt me.
[Reply]
C.Pratt Reply:
October 23rd, 2011 at 1:28 pm (Quote)
^^This, I am sure, is why it was submitted. How powerless it is to be vulnerable around people who don’t care and are trying to manipulate…
[Reply]
Emily Reply:
October 30th, 2011 at 5:59 pm (Quote)
^^^ Yes! This IS why I submitted it! I was mortified. I was brought to tears and apologetic. It wasn’t until later that I got very angry about her lack of compassion. It was my first birthing experience and I had handled my contractions at home for 5 hours before this happened.
[Reply]
Heidi had this to say,
Oct 22, 2011 @ 9:40 pm (Quote)
I know this threat is kind of stupid, since a lot of people don’t want VEs during labor, but I do sometimes, especially since I have a history of going from 5 cm to baby in an hour. Basically, if I am at 5, I need to know the doctor knows to come to the hospital!
So what I don’t like here is the insinuation that the mother is doing it wrong unless she gets an epidural and that the nurse will not provide medical care UNTIL the mom gets an epidural.
[Reply]
Hallie had this to say,
Oct 22, 2011 @ 11:11 pm (Quote)
Are most VEs from practitioners who are used to working with unmedicated women still painful? I only had 2, in labor, from my homebirth midwife and they didn’t hurt one bit. Am I just lucky or do practitioners who aren’t expecting numb women learn to do it gently?
[Reply]
Aron Reply:
October 23rd, 2011 at 8:52 am (Quote)
People who are used to working on women who can feel AND who care enough about their patients to take their time and be gentle can USUALLY (not always) manage to make the VE pretty painless. Those who are accustomed to working with numb women often don’t realize they are being so forceful and some of them just really don’t care.
[Reply]
I was climbing away from one VE, felt like she was using ungloved finger nails on me! I still delivered without medication (apart from G&A) because they won’t let me have any (high risk scar). There’s a difference between a rough VE (not a natural pain) and delivering a baby (what your body is supposed to do).
[Reply]
Promise? Great!
I think VEs hurt in labor because everything is so sensitive. But I don’t think they have to be agony. And I do believe that most L&D docs/nurses/techs/etc. don’t know how to do them gently because most of the women are drugged. And I think that’s terrible.
[Reply]
Oh GOOD. Is that a promise? Can we have that in writing please? Hey, if that is the way it works round here, what do I get if I refuse to stay on the bed? Do you eff off out of here and refuse to come back? Because that would be just AWESOME.
[Reply]
Add Your Comment.
Previous Post
« “It’s Not Like You’re Paralyzed!” Next Post
“…It Is Either A Boy Or A Girl That Is Going To Have A Whole Lot Of Problems…” »
« “It’s Not Like You’re Paralyzed!” Next Post
“…It Is Either A Boy Or A Girl That Is Going To Have A Whole Lot Of Problems…” »
“Oh, no! This will *NOT* do! I am *NOT* touching you again unless you ask me directly!”
FTFY, Nurse.
[Reply]