Posted by My OB said WHAT?!?.
Oct
7
Posted by My OB said WHAT?!?.
“…You Are Not A Whale…”
“Why do you want to deliver in water? You are not a whale! If you were meant to birth in water, you would have been born as one. Water birth is not for humans.” -Certified Nurse Midwife
There are 32 comments to this post.
Humans aren’t meant to give birth in captivity either. Someone had a great quote on that, I can’t remember who.
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So, are you anti-indoor plumbing in general, or is it just for birth? Because I’m pretty sure toilets and showers aren’t part of the “natural” order of humanity, either, but dang they’re awesome!
Same with cars, computers, refrigerators, shoes…
Oh wait, a primative woman COULD get into a pool of water during labor, as opposed to suddenly creating a car or knowing how to drive one.
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Rebecca Reply:
October 7th, 2011 at 2:26 pm (Quote)
Lets run with this. She wouldn’t be tethered to a machine or forced to labor in lithotomy either. Not only that, but she’d be allowed to eat and drink.
Doctor, if you’ll agree to those things, I might be willing to pass on the water birth (but I doubt it)
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TigerLilyFP Reply:
October 7th, 2011 at 2:36 pm (Quote)
This. But also, how many studies have been conducted on the benefits of water birth over lithotomy position. It makes me sick how the people we trust our bodies and babies to can be so ignorant, misinformed and naive.
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When I read ” you are not a whale” I was thinking aww the OB was assuring her she isn’t gaining too much weight and trying to be supportive…be it a bit tactless…
Then I read the rest. smh. nothing like a med-wife to even out a week full of stupidity.
OP I hope you got the water birth you wanted.
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Someone’s been listening to a certain celebrity internet doctor troll 
Time for a new midwife!
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Kasondra Reply:
October 7th, 2011 at 4:50 pm (Quote)
Bonus Fear Mongering Points if you have a dirty fish tank with a baby sunk to the bottom!
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Mama Wrench Reply:
October 7th, 2011 at 5:49 pm (Quote)
Or a celebrity TV OB troll.
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Karolyn Mac Reply:
October 7th, 2011 at 6:03 pm (Quote)
Okay, am I missing something? Fill me in! *smile*
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Mama Wrench Reply:
October 7th, 2011 at 6:17 pm (Quote)
The OB on The Doctors… she’s almost as bad as Dr Amy
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Karolyn Mac Reply:
October 7th, 2011 at 6:20 pm (Quote)
Seriously? That show drives me bonkers. Also, just who is Dr. Amy? I’ve seen her mentioned so many times and I have no idea who she is.
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Mama Wrench Reply:
October 7th, 2011 at 6:26 pm (Quote)
Skeptical OB — warning, do NOT read this site if you have high blood pressure or an inability to not engage with morons, and keep the benadryl nearby if you’re allergic to bullshit.
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Lisa in Texas Reply:
October 7th, 2011 at 8:38 pm (Quote)
Oh my goodness! I couldn’t handle more than about 10 minutes of that website! I guess according to them I’m an idiot who cared more about *my* experience than the lives of my children who were birthed at home.
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Mama Wrench Reply:
October 8th, 2011 at 5:10 am (Quote)
Oh, you didn’t know? Home birth is ENTIRELY about selfishly wanting the experience for yourself, because there is absolutely no data that alternative births are safer for moms or babies, and even if there was only ignorant, easily-misguided women would fall for it. Oh, and you’d better not even THINK of considering birth beautiful, extraordinary, spiritual, communal or, gasp, FUN.
SMART women shut the hell up and listen to OBs.
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Jenny Islander had this to say,
Oct 7, 2011 @ 4:46 pm (Quote)
So a tub of warm water is not okay to use during labor because it’s unnatural, but machines that go “ping” are okay to use during labor because . . .
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that’s funny- because last week you told me I WAS a whale- and that I needed to stop eating until after the baby is born, because I was six ounces over on your precious chart…..
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Mama Wrench had this to say,
Oct 7, 2011 @ 5:56 pm (Quote)
I would have answered her question. “I want to birth in water because several midwives and women report greater comfort, better pain-management and overall easier births in water than on a hospital bed. I want to birth in water because my child has spent the last 10 months in water and I feel that his introduction to the outside world should be one associated with his life thus far. I want to birth in water because the largest study on waterbirth, following 2,000 births, found fewer unnecessary interventions, lower fetal stress, faster labors, fewer epidurals, fewer episiotomes, less tearing, and shorter second-phase labor with water birth than bed birth. Now, unless you can give me an alternative that provides all of these benefits that *I* find important, can we continue to discuss my waterbirth plan?”
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Lizzie Reply:
October 19th, 2011 at 9:38 pm (Quote)
Speaking from experience, I found that soaking in a warm bath during pregnancy also helped with braxton-hicks pains. (and they were bad with my third son) Plus, when I’m stressed out or just want to relax, I turn to my husband and tell him, Watch the boys, I’m taking a bath.” I just wish I had been smarter and did research about birthing options instead of meekly going along with whatever the doctors said.
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Alyson Miers had this to say,
Oct 7, 2011 @ 6:22 pm (Quote)
The difference between humans and other animals is that anything can be “for” humans if we MAKE it so. We try it, we like the way it works, we keep doing it. Anything is “for humans” if it makes things easier for us.
Besides, it’s not like Mama’s asking to push her baby out while swimming around in 60-foot-deep cold saltwater! It’s a modest tub of warm water, for Pete’s sake. Not exactly trying to emulate marine mammals, here.
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I think what she was trying to say was “If you birth in water I cant strap you up to machines and stick my hand up you every hour, what will *I* do?”
Water birth was awesome for me. Especially as it was an unassisted homebirth, it kept the mess neatly contained in the pool. It made me feel much less concious about pushing, I didnt particularly want my mum and sister to see my bits close up and I felt nicely cocooned by the water so it felt like a safe place to push. But I guess medwives don’t take things like that into account.
I always call my son my little waterbaby, maybe I should start calling him my little whale calf!!
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Chelsea Reply:
October 8th, 2011 at 10:09 pm (Quote)
Ditto. My unassisted birth on the couch was messy, I ended up throwing the blankets on it away and all the towels I used under me while rocking on the birth ball I had. (And I still want to get rid of the couch with the giant stain on it, but my hubby is too stubborn. Grrr!)
My water birth involved no laundry. And I didn’t have to lift a finger, hubby got to use his plumbing pump and was happy. Yay!
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Rachel Reply:
October 9th, 2011 at 8:37 am (Quote)
I can relate to birthing on the couch. My fourth child was supposed to be a home water birth, but I felt that something was “different” about my labor, so I asked to be checked. The midwives discovered he was presenting face first and had me get out of the pool and move to the couch to tilt and rotate my pelvis to attempt to get the baby to change position. After an hour of this, my water broke everywhere. A little while after that, he was born. We had chux pads down that contained the blood and stuff, but the amniotic fluid was dripping everywhere. Oh, my poor couch…
The midwives doused it with several bottles of hydrogen peroxide and lugged it outside on the deck to dry in the sun (it was a very lovely spring morning). We joked that I deserved a new couch after birthing the baby face first (with nary a tear to my perineum or bruise to his face). But before the midwives left, they remarked that amniotic fluid was probably not as bad as other things couches have seen (i.e. vomit and urine). The blankets and towels washed up nicely. And I’m hanging onto the couch a little while longer. 
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I guess that means I don’t have to worry about a section because if women were meant to have their babies surgically removed we would be born with zippered bellies. And I won’t have an IV because if we were meant to have them we would be born with that needle in place. Or ultrasounds, because if I were meant to see my baby early, there would be a window above that zipper.
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I would not have traded my water births for ANYTHING!! I had 2 hospital hirths and 2 home water births…the birthing pool made an AMAZING difference in the level of comfort I was in! This seriously sounds like an OB puppet said this, not a real midwife!
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“So what you’re saying is you’ve never read anything about waterbirth, and you’re trying to shame me into not wanting one? I just wanted to be clear what we were talking about.”
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