Posted by My OB said WHAT?!?.
May
8
Posted by My OB said WHAT?!?.
“…Next Time, Salads And A Cesarean Section.”
“This is quite a mess. Next time, salads and a cesarean section.” – Certified Nurse Midwife repairing an episiotomy and additional tearing after the birth of a large baby.
There are 27 comments to this post.
Nice one, a comment about how you don’t like repairing vaginas, and you think I’m fat. Why do you work in this profession again?
[Reply]
Jenny Islander had this to say,
May 8, 2011 @ 4:34 pm (Quote)
Why not just go all the way and recommend cigarettes, they way they used to, to keep the baby conveniently small?
“Oh, look. I did something to you that was not necessary based on actual evidence of labor outcomes. The thing I did to you ended up inconveniencing me (never mind your pain and suffering). Therefore, there must be something wrong with YOU.”
[Reply]
Jespren had this to say,
May 8, 2011 @ 4:59 pm (Quote)
Because there is less cutting\suturing in a c-section??? Or (since this is a medwife) is she just trying to make sure she doesn’t get repeat business from this patient? Oh, I know, the local OB practice pays her a ‘finder fee’ for every refered patient!
[Reply]
Jane Reply:
May 8th, 2011 at 5:42 pm (Quote)
I was thinking the first part of that: you mean when the doctor cuts for a c-section, it’s NOT a mess? There’s no suturing? There’s no bleeding? Fur reelz?
And if the mom would be having a c-section anyhow, why starve herself in an attempt to have a starved baby? Nope, this is a midwife who mismanaged the delivery and doesn’t want the mom to get mad at her, so she’s shaming the mom into not saying anything about the tear/episiotomy.
(Also: I thought they claimed an episiotomy was “a nice straight cut” which would be “easier to repair than a jagged tear.” So much for their propaganda.)
[Reply]
This was from a birth I was doula-ing a few months back. Mama and her hubby were expecting their first baby. She had always been healthy and lean; average height and weight. They shared a love for dancing and went salsa dancing several times a week. Point is: she was the picture of maternal health and well-being. She took pride in her diet, her figure and her activity level (and she damn well should have! She looked better pregnant than I do un-pregnant!)
So, we labored at home for a few hours. Could hardly tell when this beautiful lady was having contractions. She’d kinda drift off for a minute or two and then come back with a big sigh. If it weren’t for her husband’s anxious insistence–that I thought at the time was just first time Daddy jitters—she might have very possibly ended up with an unintended home birth (this was my 10th birth as a doula).
When we got to the hospital, she was anticipating her regular CNM to be there. Family emergency for her usual provider meant that the on-call CNM was there instead. Mama was completely dilated upon admittance; nothing left to do but wait for the urge to push. I think we waited without too much hassle for about an hour before CNM started getting pushy about pushing. No natural urge, but Mama was tempted to just try it and see. It was all downhill from there.
It became obvious that baby was OP, LOP or ROP. Mama still didn’t make much noise or mention much about back pain, but the lack of progress pointed to fetal malpositioning. CNM suggested different positions for pushing (yay!) but at one point after feeling baby’s head during a vaginal exam, turned to me and L&D RN and said, “if the baby is LOP, do we want her to lay on her right side or her left side to push?” I think any respect I had been clinging to for her poofed away at the point. And a post I wrote a few days later started formulating in my head: http://wombitmayconcern.wordpress.com/2010/11/27/med-wife-crisis/
CNM became more irritated with the situation (not Mama or baby) and called in OBGYN for backup. This doc was phenomenal. She just sat on the edge of Mama’s bed, hands off, and encouraged her while assessing her during bearing down. This went on for nearly 3 hours before the BIG C came up via the CNM. Doc hadn’t said a word about it. Mama was still bearing down every 3 to 5 minutes and changing positions; no drugs, no Pit, no IV.
Finally, shortly after Doc left the room, CNM started jabbing Mama with a local “just in case”. We all know what THAT means. One or two pushes later, a small episiotomy turned into a rather large episiotomy and a 9 lb 9 oz baby came screaming out! Baby had quite the exaggerated cone head and the swelling indicated that baby had indeed been ROP for quite some time.
And sitting between Mama’s legs, while she was trembling with the rush of postpartum hormones, is when that lovely quip about Mama’s eating habits was said. Not as an aside to the nurse or under her breath, but directly to Mama.
I was tempted to inject the woman’s forehead with some local anesthetic and perform a *little* lobotomy on the CNM…just in case…
[Reply]
Alyson Miers Reply:
May 8th, 2011 at 7:42 pm (Quote)
Sounds like Mama would’ve been better off with the nice OB repairing the asshat CNM’s handiwork.
[Reply]
Heather Reply:
May 8th, 2011 at 7:50 pm (Quote)
Wow, too bad mama didn’t just fire the CNM and have the OB stay! What a jerk medwife!
[Reply]
Sarah Dorrance-Minch Reply:
May 10th, 2011 at 5:37 pm (Quote)
HORRENDOUS.
You say you “thought at the time” the husband’s insistence on going to the hospital right away was due to first time jitters. Was it?
[Reply]
Breezy Reply:
May 10th, 2011 at 6:24 pm (Quote)
She was showing signs of transition at the house. As a doula, I have learned that it’s not the best idea for me to guess where a Mom’s at in her labor because she knows what she’s feeling and what she wants. I’m not going to tell her that she ought to do go anywhere she isn’t saying she wants to go. In my gut, I knew she was getting close. But I had some reservations in saying so. As well as she was getting along with her contractions and being a first time Mom, I figured it would be a little while longer. She was completely dilated by the time we got to the hospital and it was only a 10 minute drive. Hubby had been mentioning getting in the car for about a half hour before Mom decided it was what she wanted to do.
[Reply]
Breezy Reply:
May 10th, 2011 at 6:26 pm (Quote)
I guess my answer is: he was right on target. If Mom had been laboring in the more classical, Hollywood movie way he probably would have been much more vocal about going to the birthplace. Her calm, matter-of-factness about “I just threw up, that means we should go” demeanor masked a lot of the signs of advanced labor.
[Reply]
With my own due date fast-approaching, I can’t help but imagine myself as the brand new mother, hearing a medical professional say these words to me. I think I would have the strong urge both to cry and to kick the midwife in the head. Because anger and crying, inconveniently, usually go together for me. Poor, poor OP! I am so sorry that these were among the first words you heard after the birth of your baby. 
[Reply]
shannon Reply:
May 8th, 2011 at 7:16 pm (Quote)
Oh, and “This is quite a mess” is about as nice as the “It looks like hamburger meat down here” that I got from the dr. who was repairing my 4th degree tear. There should be a course on Things Not to Say While Performing Repairs. Nothing that forces you to visualize your own gaping flesh.
[Reply]
Melissa Reply:
May 8th, 2011 at 10:52 pm (Quote)
I had a “things not to say while repairing” moment during my son’s birth too – “Do you think this belongs here, or there?”, my midwife said to her assistant. YIKES! She explained what she meant later, and it made sense, but at the time I was like OMG What happened down there that you can’t even tell what goes where?!?!
[Reply]
Susan Jenkins Reply:
May 9th, 2011 at 5:34 pm (Quote)
This website and fb page should be mandatory reading in every every OB residency program, CNM school, and maternity nursing class. I’m sure someone has said this before on this site, but every time I visit, I just get overwhelmed by parade of stupidity, arrogance, insensitivity, sadism that these stories reveal. I hope women file complaints with the hospital and the OB/CNM practice a few weeks after they get their babies safely home. Some of these actually call for complaints to the state medical or nursing board.
[Reply]
Sheva Reply:
May 9th, 2011 at 5:44 pm (Quote)
Can you give us websites and/or phone numbers to use? And, would you happen to know if doulas can submit complaints?
[Reply]
Susan Jenkins Reply:
May 9th, 2011 at 10:18 pm (Quote)
Every state has a medical board and a nursing board. The medical board might be called the board of medicine or healing AGRs board. In most states, CNMs as well as nurses are under the state board of nursing. These boards accept complaints from the public. They do not reveal your identity. They have authority to discipline licensed doctors, nurses, CNMs for all kinds of things that might appear to violate the rules for professional conduct for those under their jurisdiction. Just google you state’s name and the phrase board of medicine or board of nursing. There should be a link under the heading Coomplaints. Or call, identify yourself as a patient or a witness (yes, doulas CMA make complaints as witnesses) and ask for help in making a complaint.
With the hospital, it will almost certainly have a Patient Advocate. Most hospitals do. Look at the hospital’s website or call the information number and ask to speak to the patient advocate. Or, better, write your complaint and mail or email it to the advocate. Alternatively, find out the name of the chief od the medical staff and the administrator (or chief executive officer as he or she may be called) at the hospital. All this will be on the website. Write to them both and cc the other and write out the complaint. again, either the patient or the doula can do this, since a witness can complain about a staff member. Complaints about a nurse should go to the VP for Nursing Services and the CEO of the hospital. The hospital complaint should not be anonymous, and you should let them know you expect a written response.
Also, there is an online surbey called The Birth Survey that is like Angie’s List but specifically for OBs, midwives, hospitals, etc. A good place to warn others to avoid some of these insensitive (and worse!) OBs, CNMs, and nursing staffs at particular hospitals. We shouldn’t have to take birth abuse and lies and stupidity lying down (pun intended). Good luck.
[Reply]
Holly Reply:
May 21st, 2011 at 10:43 pm (Quote)
My friend is half heartedly schooling for Medical Assistant and wants to go to an OB clinic to work. I asked her to read this site.. she acted offended! When I tried to explain that there are MANY GREAT examples of what *not* to say she said she was smarter than that… I’m not convinced lol! I can SO see her saying MANY of these things (as she has said a quarter of them to me or to other people and at least half of the breastfeeding ones).. This really should be mandatory reading.. with case studies and class discussions about some of the instances and how they could be *better*.
[Reply]
Stephanie - Home with the Kids had this to say,
May 8, 2011 @ 7:07 pm (Quote)
Next time, a new midwife.
[Reply]
Sarah Dorrance-Minch had this to say,
May 10, 2011 @ 5:40 pm (Quote)
Next time, squatting when the pushing urge hits (especially if the baby is starting to crown), perineal support, maybe a birthing pool… Oh, and no episiotomy, and please, a competent care provider rather than an insecure, rude medwife.
[Reply]
Eric Peterson had this to say,
Dec 14, 2011 @ 11:03 pm (Quote)
Negative news – Syria’s ‘mutilation mystery’ deepens…
[Reply]
Add Your Comment.
Previous Post
« “If You Don’t Push Until 10, Your Baby Will Suffocate In The Birth Canal…” Next Post
“Ugh, Look, She Keeps Peeing Everywhere.” »
« “If You Don’t Push Until 10, Your Baby Will Suffocate In The Birth Canal…” Next Post
“Ugh, Look, She Keeps Peeing Everywhere.” »
Next time, if you come near me to cut me I kick you in the head so hard you’ll be the one needing stitches.
[Reply]