Jul 25

“Don’t Get Your Hopes Up!”

“Don’t get your hopes up!” -OB to mother, immediately after an ultrasound and pelvic exam for unexplained bleeding, when the mother expressed excitement at finding out the baby was a boy.

80 people dislike these words.

There are 10 comments to this post.

Jane had this to say, Jul 25, 2010 @ 4:39 am (Quote)

Ah, “Search and destroy obstetrics.” Where simple maternal joy is an impediment to finding potential problems that make the job interesting.

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beccaisadoula had this to say, Jul 25, 2010 @ 4:46 am (Quote)

Speaking as an ultrasound-confirmed boy (now a mother of 2), she could’ve been refering to the fact that an ultrasound showing the sex of a baby boy can often be incorrect.

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Jane Reply:
July 25th, 2010 at 5:13 am Jane(Quote)

Oh, that does make sense. I thought the “don’t get your hopes up” referred to the unexplained bleeding part, as in “Don’t get your hopes up that the baby will survive.”

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Mistie Reply:
July 25th, 2010 at 9:17 am Mistie(Quote)

I agree, I first took it for a miscarriage comment, but can see the gender perspective. Either way, it should have been handled differently.

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Heather P Reply:
July 25th, 2010 at 6:06 am Heather P(Quote)

Yep, that was my impression. That the tech meant that it could be a girl.

However, this could be easily misunderstood to mean that something might be wrong with the baby. Perhaps a poor choice of wording.

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Heather Reply:
July 26th, 2010 at 9:58 am Heather(Quote)

I was an ultrasound-confirmed boy, too! My penis seemed to have fallen off before birth, though.

While I saw that as a possibility, I knew it wouldn’t be as offensive if it wasn’t related to the bleeding and the bleeding wouldn’t have been mentioned if it wasn’t a scare-tactic.

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The Deranged Housewife had this to say, Jul 25, 2010 @ 10:33 am (Quote)

I had just been diagnosed with a threatened miscarriage, so Dr. Ding Dong was telling me not to get too excited about the baby – I think he was rattling off statistics of how many people have miscarriages, blah blah blah – I think I was too startled by his comment to hear the rest. This was my first, so I was naive back then….:?

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Jane Reply:
July 25th, 2010 at 11:14 am Jane(Quote)

Yikes. I’m sorry.

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beccaisadoula Reply:
July 25th, 2010 at 4:24 pm beccaisadoula(Quote)

You know, your PCP doesn’t rattle off statistics about how many people die in car accidents daily when you drive in to see him/her. Why do some docs feel the need to squash hopes like that?! Why not be optimistic??

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