Posted by My OB said WHAT?!?.
Posted by My OB said WHAT?!?.
“What’s *SHE* Doing Here?”
“What’s SHE doing here?” -OB upon seeing a doula come into the room with a birthing ball.
To light incense, do seances, and for the spells, duh!
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I can’t tell you how many times I get these words or the look that says them. Sad that hospitals have no CLUE how they are disenfranchising women. “Come see us, and we’ll take away any rights and dignity you thought you had and act like we’re doing you a favor.”
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Sarah Dorrance-Minch Reply:
June 13th, 2010 at 8:20 pm (Quote)
No clue? Oh, I think the hospital personnel have a few clues about how they disenfranchise us.
It’s just that they feel it’s for our own good, so it’s okay. We have to be saved from our own folly. We’re pregnant women, women giving birth, remember. Totally irrational, half out of our minds with hormones, and easily susceptible to the latest “fads” we read about in celebrity magazines. Like VBACs (which we want even though “a lot” of us wanted that first Caesarean on demand, for purely elective reasons like being afraid of labour), waterbirthing, homebirthing, and doulas.
Best to just gently or not so gently discourage us and with the proper handling and managing, get us into bed, lying down like the patients we are even if we don’t know it, with the monitor on. It’s the best way, really. It’s For Our Own Good. Just like everything else.
Remember, ALL THAT MATTERS IS A HEALTHY BABY! (TM)
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Jane Reply:
June 14th, 2010 at 4:00 am (Quote)
Reminds me of a CS Lewis quote:
“Of all tyrannies, a tyranny sincerely exercised for the good of its victims may be the most oppressive. It would be better to live under robber barons than under omnipotent moral busybodies.”
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Michelle Potter Reply:
June 14th, 2010 at 2:52 pm (Quote)
Awesome quote!
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Sarah Dorrance-Minch Reply:
June 14th, 2010 at 5:04 pm (Quote)
Yeah, I copied it and pasted it to my Facebook profile page.
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“What is she doing here?”
Um. Her job?
Probably a lot more thoroughly and with more attention paid to her client than you will?
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yeah, I get that look a lot….sad really.
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Aron Reply:
June 14th, 2010 at 6:49 am (Quote)
Yep, me too. But, then again, I’ve also had the fun of converting a few nurses to doula-love so maybe it all balances out in the end.
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Sarah Dorrance-Minch Reply:
June 14th, 2010 at 5:02 pm (Quote)
You doulas are my heroines. I considered doula work for a while, but I decided that it would be hard for my family (my girls all have special needs, and the eldest of them is seven, and we don’t even have a sitter, so if I had to answer a call and my husband was at work, it would be awkward), unfair to the client (I am impaired in the area of reading body language, and my spontaneous social interaction isn’t much better) and impossible for my career stability (I have no tact, can’t hide what I am thinking, do not tolerate fools, and would get in trouble with hospital personnel probably five minutes into my first assignment).
I am in awe of your ability to walk hospital tightropes to give your clients the TLC they deserve.
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SHE is a friend who is here to support a woman in pregnancy and labor.
It really doesn’t matter that she’s paid, good emotional support is sincere and makes the doula more your friend than any other ‘professional’ who may come into the room.
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Wendy Reply:
June 17th, 2010 at 1:32 pm (Quote)
Unless it’s one of those hospitals that bans doulas. Then she’s a “sister,” “friend,” “sister-in-law,” “my mom” . . . .
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Claire Reply:
June 18th, 2010 at 2:49 am (Quote)
A hospital that bans Doulas???? Only in America! Wow, I can’t imagine that happening here!
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Sarah Dorrance-Minch Reply:
June 18th, 2010 at 6:51 am (Quote)
Having spent my junior year abroad and then two years of grad school in England, and fallen in love with NHS (because for once I actually got comprehensive health care, and I didn’t have to wait in a room with fifty or more other indigent or otherwise unlucky people and hope my number was one of the ones drawn out of a hat that evening, which was how the free clinic where I lived operated; I got better care at the student health centre on my undergraduate campus, but it wasn’t much point going there if I needed a prescription for anything more arcane than Sudafed or amoxicillin) my first incliniation is to say, Of course American hospitals can ban doulas. Doulas mean less epidurals and less c-sections. There is a conflict of interest between for-profit medicine and consumer rights in the medical marketplace, which is one reason why ACOG can run obstetric care like a cartel runs a monopoly on a commodity, and why making medicine entirely privatized with almost no regulation of payment arrangements or medical procedures is asking for trouble.
However, I have heard that NHS is not exactly client-centred when it comes to obstetric, either. I had great experiences with NHS for basic, non-specialty stuff – management of my migraines and allergies, antibiotics when I caught pneumonia, help determining why I came down with severe chronic fatigue symptoms in my second year at Oxford (turns out I caught mono at the ripe old age of twenty eight, and like chicken pox, the older you are when you first get it, the harder it hits you). Heck, I even had house calls. I loved NHS. Oh, and free birth control! Wow! But I never got pregnant while in England, so I can’t say much about the value of socializing medicine in obstetrics due to the lack of personal experience.
Certainly things seem to be better in Scandinavia, the Netherlands, and some parts of Germany and France. Maybe it has more to do with a nation’s cultural perception of pregnancy and birth than it does with payment arrangements.
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Claire Reply:
June 18th, 2010 at 3:42 pm (Quote)
It’s certainly not been my experience. I have been pregnant four times. One miscarriage, one live birth at 20 weeks and two premature babies who have gone through neonatal care. I couldn’t have asked for better treatment and from my understanding in support groups if I had been American I wouldn’t have my two girls because I wouldn’t have had the help I had after my first daughter died.
We have a lot of rights and because doctors aren’t on piece work there’s no incentive (in fact there’s disincentive) to push into expensive treatments. However some women don’t know this and can be led by suggestions rather than questioning things. I try to teach as many people as possible to use their TBRAINS when in hospitals.
It’s not illegal anywhere here to have a home birth, in fact it’s a legal right to have a home birth, no one can stop a mother who wants to deliver at home from doing so and they *have* to find someone to send out if a mother says she is not coming in. The government has set a target (I can’t remember the target date) of a minimum of 10% home births.
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Wendy Reply:
June 18th, 2010 at 10:56 am (Quote)
The Today Show–never a bang-up source of obstetric information, lemme tell you–covered this issue some time ago. The overall messages were 1) “buyer beware” 2) only rich people can afford doulas and 3) they can “get in the way” of the doctor, who is the “leader” in the “delivery” process. According to the report, it was the latter reason that compelled some hospitals to ban doulas altogether.
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Sarah Dorrance-Minch Reply:
June 18th, 2010 at 11:08 am (Quote)
That’s the same “news” show that condemned nurse-in-a-box kiosks in groceries and pharmacies on the grounds that nurse practitioners couldn’t POSSIBLY provide quality care for things like strep throat and giving flu shots on request (despite the fact that they’re usually in charge of those routine matters when they’re working in a doctor’s office, at far more inconvenient hours for busy families than grocery/pharmacy kiosks tend to keep, and at higher cost), isn’t it?
Also the one that dabbled in reality television by cheerfully televising, live, an elective C-section?
UGH
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“Oh, I hired her because she knows about natural birth!”
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