Posted by My OB said WHAT?!?.
Jun
8
Posted by My OB said WHAT?!?.
“Wow, No More For You!”
“Wow, no more for you!” -OB to a mother during surgery for a repeat cesarean.
“What!!! No more what? no more kids?” Mother, starting to become hysterical.
*silence* OB ignores mother and starts up conversation w/ other doctors present.
“Somebody tell me something!” -Mother
“Oh, he means no more VBACS for you.” -Different OB
“Why?” -Mother
“Well, I’m done here. See you guys tomorrow.” -OB as he left the room.
There are 32 comments to this post.
What is wrong with these people?
Sacred. Birth. Of. New. Baby.
Not. A. Time. To. Drop. Bombs.
Aaaargh
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Jane Reply:
June 8th, 2010 at 6:48 pm (Quote)
Not even the bomb-drop as much as the refusal to explain it. Some OBs are on a power trip, and I think this story is a prime example. THe mother ASKED the OB to explain himself, and instead he gives her silence and then talks to other doctors, whom we are to assume are worth his time.
This isn’t malpractice, but it sure as heck is unprofessional and it’s just one of those times when you wish this person’s name cold be emblazoned in lights because he should be on display for the kind of person he is, who needs to prove his superiority over the woman he’s just cut open by proving he, and he alone, has information she wants, and he doesn’t have to give it to her.
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The Deranged Housewife had this to say,
Jun 8, 2010 @ 7:14 pm (Quote)
The one bright spot in all of this is that this doctor is full of sh!t.
I hope she was able to corner the SOB later and make him explain himself, because that is just beyond unprofessional on so many levels.
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This was mine.
And the part I didn’t even add was that I have never even met this OB (I had a midwife) before. No introductions to me, he never even looked at me! It was like he was saying “wow, no more for you” to the other people in the room. And I really did assume he meant no more kids and that he was giving me a hysterectomy or something. I still have no idea why I’m not “supposed” to have anymore VBACs per asshat godwannabe. I am assuming a thinned scar, but that is no grounds for an automatic c-section. He seems just the type to spout off incorrect info to scare women into his submission.
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Michelle Potter Reply:
June 8th, 2010 at 9:27 pm (Quote)
How awful! I would find it frightening to still not know what exactly he meant — I think it would hide in the back of my mind causing me to worry that there was some serious problem of which I was not aware.
Why can’t OBs just remember that we are human beings??
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Alisa Reply:
June 8th, 2010 at 10:40 pm (Quote)
I think I’m afraid to go get my records and find out that if I had another child I would have to have another c-section. I keep putting off having another baby until I get those records. If I found out that I couldn’t qualify for a homebirth and I’d have to have another c-section, I’d be devistated all over again. So by not getting the records I can pretend/imagine that someday I will have my VBAC, you know? Oh, and this happened 3 1/2 years ago, so I’ve had plenty of time to get them.
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Jane Reply:
June 9th, 2010 at 4:22 am (Quote)
I’ll float you an idea I used to routinely give to moms on the infant loss groups about taking pictures of their babies, but it works here too because this man was trying to kill your desire to have more children and to have a VBAC: request the records, but don’t read them.
Obtain them. Once they’re in your possession, you can look at them whenever you want, but you don’t *have* to. Just have them on-hand. Then, at whatever point you decide you do want to look at them, you can make an appointment with a midwife or a VBAC-friendly doctor and bring them to that appointment. The only purpose of that appt would be to review the records with you.
But once they’re in your possession, you’ll feel better about having them near you, even unread, because the power and control will be back in your hands.
Be prepared for some resistance to obtaining those records, and if you get ANY at all, contact your state licensing board because they take offense at that. 
They act almost immediately because that’s a cut-and-dried situation.
Good luck. And ***HUG***
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Jane Reply:
June 9th, 2010 at 9:26 am (Quote)
I wanted to add, you can have a trusted friend read your medical records and then ask your friend for ONLY the information you want to know. That way you don’t need to relive the trauma by reading all about it, but if you want to know the direction of the incision or whether this guy tied your tubes without consent, or whether you were having a uterine rupture, your friend can answer that question for you based on what the records say.
But you won’t need to see anything else which might trigger a flashback.
**more hugs**
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Sarah Dorrance-Minch Reply:
June 9th, 2010 at 9:54 am (Quote)
You’re better off obtaining your records than not.
They might reveal that there is, in fact, nothing wrong with you – aside from having been given an OB whose professional judgment was worthless. (Most OBs don’t believe in VBAC anyway, no matter how safe a candidate a given mother is.)
They might reveal a medical problem that it would be in your best interests to know about. In general, it’s better to know about potential problems than to not know.
They might also reveal a completely false description of your labour. I found that out after ordering my own medical records. You then have the right to dispute what is on the record.
And everything else Jane said is right on the money.
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Kelly Reply:
June 9th, 2010 at 7:09 am (Quote)
Alisa – I’m so sorry this OB was such an asswipe. I had an OB tell me something very similar during my second c-section (also had never met this OB, I was an HBAC transfer – I’m splayed open on the table and she told another OB in the room that I shouldn’t have anymore kids). I freaked (rightfully so, as you did) and the only reason I found anything out was because my doula was there demanding an answer (I probably can have another child, but it WILL be c-section since I nearly ruptured). I’ve also been avoiding getting my records, though I like Jane’s advice. I already *know* what they say, and it still scares me to have to see it in black and white, kwim? I know how it feels to get that kind of news on what is supposed to be one of the happiest days of your life – so sorry you now know, too. (((hugs)))
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Michelle Potter Reply:
June 9th, 2010 at 9:43 am (Quote)
Kelly, not to second guess you because I honestly don’t know, but are you sure that you can’t have a VBAC? The other day I was reading a blog by a mom of five who is also an OB. She was having an induced (!) VBAC with her fourth when she nearly ruptured (she said she had a “uterine window”) and ended up with an emergency repeat c-section. She scheduled a c-section for her fifth, and then ended up with a surprise VBAC when she went into precipitous labor on the morning of her planned surgery! Here’s the link:
http://www.drpoppy.com/wordpress/?p=116
I don’t know if her story has any bearing on her situation, or if it would at all be safe to try a VBAC, but if it were me, this story would at least make me want to find out.
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Michelle Potter Reply:
June 9th, 2010 at 9:44 am (Quote)
Uh, I meant, “any bearing on YOUR situation.”
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Kelly Reply:
June 9th, 2010 at 1:20 pm (Quote)
Thanks, Michelle. I read that a few days ago and it made my day! My primary c-section was botched (though I didn’t know this until I was opened for the second) – my bladder was unintentionally sewn to my uterine wall. When I went into labor with my second looking to HBAC, my uterus would only stretch so far before it started to tear. My “window” was not at my scar – but above it, where it was attached to my bladder. When repairing the near rupture, they used my bladder as a “patch” to cover the hole (intentionally this time). As I understand it, if I were to labor, the same thing would happen to me this time as last time – but likely sooner and quicker. I even wrote to THE vbac doctor, Dr. Tate, who agreed that I shouldn’t labor and am now one of the few for whom an “elective” c-section (still not truly elective in my mind) would be better/safer. I haven’t done tons of research yet, but I think my only option for a purposeful VBAC should I ever be pregnant again would likely be UC, which I’m not comfy with since I’ve never birthed a baby and now have this weird repair job. I just don’t think I’d find a provider who would take me as a VBAC candidate. Still, I fully intend to fib about my due date a little to push the RCS as close to term as possible (I overcook babies anyway…) and every fiber of my soul is hoping for an “accidental VBAC” like Dr. Poppy had! I’m considering writing to her to ask how her window was repaired, it would at let me know if the stories are truly as similar they appear to be. 
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Michelle Potter Reply:
June 9th, 2010 at 1:52 pm (Quote)
Oh my goodness! How terrible that the doctor could screw up your surgery so badly, and you didn’t even know until it endangered your life and your baby’s!
If you do have another baby, I wish you either a very safe VBAC, or a very smooth and mommy-baby-friendly c-section with care providers who really care.
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Brige Reply:
June 9th, 2010 at 10:13 am (Quote)
I would get your records ASAP… as I have found things often have a way of disappearing, We’re in the military and move alot, and I always get a copy of med records as we go… most are still sealed, but I would also be interested in why exactly he made those remarks, was it because of scar tissue, adhesion, or I mean there are a million different reasons an “asshat godwannabe” (which I love BTW) would.could say something like that, including that he was just a dumb dumb…. I mean most OBs would say no more babies/VBACs after a first c/section… because it is more convenient for them… find a midwife who does a lot of VBACs show them your records. I have found information to be very liberating… like it kills me that they force you into all of these tests at the beginning of pregnancy and then never review the results with you unless there is something wrong… I wouldn’t assume the worst… his opinion is just that, opinion, and hardly fact… its one of my biggest pet peeves with drs in general, they present their opinion as fact, and we as clients/customers, assume that they’re just giving us facts/info when really they are pushing us down their chosen path for us….
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Alisa Reply:
June 9th, 2010 at 3:58 pm (Quote)
It’s funny, because I love information too so the fact I have waited this long is totally out of character for me.
But yes, it is a good idea to have it even if I don’t read it. If I am able to finally talk my husband into having another baby, I would be getting it in a heart beat and discussing it with a midwife (my PCP Naturopath is a retired Midwife who said she’d be happy to look at it with me).
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I’ve heard that with all the drugs (versed?) they give that some things they say you don’t necessarily remember but you internalize. Or even not simply because of the drugs but also its such a vulnerable spot that the words have a bigger impact. And thats a reason that OBs say stupid things during surgery, to prevent moms from trying to VBAC. My OB made up some idiot excuse for me to not be able to VBAC while I was still on the table. It almost worked too. I slowly was able to crawl out of that hole he pushed me into thanks to my midwife (my cesarean was after a home birth transfer, so this was an LM) and ICAN.
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That makes me wonder whether he intentionally used a vertical incision to “punish” the mother for attempting a VBAC/asking questions/being informed.
This is another good reason to get the records and find out exactly what he did.
I am so very sorry your baby’s birth was made into a scary and traumatic time by that unprofessional behavior.
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Sarah Dorrance-Minch Reply:
June 9th, 2010 at 10:03 am (Quote)
Good point.
Although it could be noted that while VBAC with a vertical incision is riskier (especially if the uterus has scars from previous surgeries), women HAVE gone on to VBAC – even after multiple surgeries – and were perfectly fine during and after. If you choose that route, if it applies, you definitely wouldn’t want any kind of induction or augmentation, though – and personally, I’d avoid an epidural because I’d want to feel everything associated with the labour. I am told that whether it’s a catastrophic rupture or (more commonly) a benign dehiscence, it feels like nothing else one would associate with pregnancy or giving birth.
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Sarah Dorrance-Minch had this to say,
Jun 9, 2010 @ 10:05 am (Quote)
This whole dialogue reminds me of a vaudeville routine.
That wasn’t meant to be complimentary.
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Sarah Dorrance-Minch Reply:
June 9th, 2010 at 10:06 am (Quote)
I just realized that my words were more vague than I wanted them to be. OUR dialogue here is not even remotely something out of a bad vaudeville routine. I was only referring to what the doctors said among themselves (ugh!)
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You may not want to wait too long to obtain a copy of the medical records (for you and the baby). I know some states have a minimum number of years that offices are required to keep medical records after which they are destroyed. All the doc’s I’ve worked with kept them for ten years and if patients are no longer currently under their care, zip to the shredder. They are under no obligation to try to find the patient or their new doc to transfer records. Not sure if it’s the same with hospitals or not.
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The WellRounded Mama had this to say,
Jul 21, 2010 @ 12:48 pm (Quote)
There’s no telling what this guy meant when he said that. It could mean there was an actual dehiscence there and that’s why he said it, but it could also mean lots of other things.
For example, after a second c/s, some docs won’t permit you to have a TOL anymore. It could be as simple as that (and not all docs follow that recommendation, which is hopefully changing soon anyhow). Or he might have done a T incision or a vertical incision (high or low) and considers that a contraindication for labor (controversial). Or there could have been thinning in the scar without actual dehiscence; many women are told they were “about to rupture” when we really don’t know if thinning is significant or not (lots of women have had “thinning” uterine segments and still gone on to have a VBACs afterwards). Or perhaps there was something else going on entirely.
You won’t know unless you get your records. I think Jane’s suggestion is an excellent one; getting your records doesn’t mean you have to READ them right now or even ever, or you can have someone read it for you and give you the gist of the info. You can choose whether what to do later on, but having the records GIVES you that choice. I hope you’ll pursue it when you are ready.
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The only nice thing I can say here is that when this doctor finds himself in a crisis in his life, and everyone has a crisis sometimes, he’ll be surrounded by people as callous and self-centered as himself.
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