Posted by My OB said WHAT?!?.
May
5
Posted by My OB said WHAT?!?.
“…You Can’t Have A Due Date Without One.”
“Well, she didn’t have an ultrasound so she doesn’t have a due date. You can’t have a due date with out one.” -L&D nurse
There are 51 comments to this post.
Marie Dowis had this to say,
May 5, 2010 @ 4:53 am (Quote)
Wow, that’s a really brainless comment. You just stay pregnant forever if you don’t have an ultrasound? They seem to think none of us actually know when we got pregnant.
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This is precisely why I refused to have a dating ultrasound. That way, since I never had a due-date, they couldn’t ever try to induce me for being post-dates. 
(Okay, actually, I refused the dating ultrasound because I knew the ovulation date, but they still wanted to rely on the dating ultrasound, so I refused it and they had no choice. Baby was born on the exact date I said he would be.)
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So women 75 years ago never gave birth?? gah..
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Michelle Potter Reply:
May 5th, 2010 at 10:28 am (Quote)
Try 29 years ago. My mother says she never had any ultrasounds with me, that they were still new and most women did not have them routinely. I don’t think she had them with my brothers, either, who are 27 and almost 25.
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Heather Reply:
May 5th, 2010 at 2:30 pm (Quote)
My mother had a u/s 30 years ago (me) and said that they were routine by that point (I was a boy, btw, so that tells you how accurate they were, lol–they showed her my “penis” and everything).
But the point of the person you replied to was to pick a random date close in history, but far enough back that u/s hadn’t been invented yet.
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Janice Reply:
May 5th, 2010 at 4:06 pm (Quote)
I was born 34 years ago now -gah!- at Cook County Hospital in Chicago and my mother didn’t have an ultrasound. I have 3 younger brothers and she didn’t have an ultrasound until her last child, who was born in the early ’80s. I asked her about this and she said that ultrasound was new and not widespread. With new technology, they roll it out slowly, with the research trials in the teaching hospitals first, and then if it spreads into general use if people don’t start dropping dead from it.
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Swan Reply:
May 5th, 2010 at 7:01 pm (Quote)
My mom had her babies 21-32 years ago. She only had an ultrasound with the twins to confirm that there were indeed 2 babies (at almost 8 months). So it must not have been routine yet where she was at.
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Michelle Potter Reply:
May 7th, 2010 at 12:35 pm (Quote)
You know what? I KNOW my mother said this to me, during a conversation about how a friend of mine had ultrasounds at every appointment, but yesterday I was showing my daughters a scrapbook of my life that my mom made, and on the third page there is an ultrasound photo. I think my wonderful mother must have mis-remembered. Maybe she didn’t have ultrasounds with my brothers.
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Heather Reply:
May 7th, 2010 at 2:31 pm (Quote)
I have a friend in Korea who is from the US and she hasn’t had a prenatal appointment in months because they insist on u/s at every appointment and apparently, if you refuse, they can refuse to see you O_o I’m sure it’s great seeing your baby every month, growing, but I wouldn’t want to subject my babies to that much exposure.
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decemberbaby had this to say,
May 5, 2010 @ 5:30 am (Quote)
… and we all know that without a due date, the baby won’t be able to come out, and she’ll be pregnant FOREVER.
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And then the baby will *NEVER* come out. ~shiver~
Seriously??
And also, did you notice the “talking over the mom’s head” thing? I hate that. Hello? I’m right here!
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Jane Reply:
May 5th, 2010 at 6:17 am (Quote)
I’m wondering whom the L&D nurse was talking to, actually. The second sentence sounds like a “follow-up” to the first because whomever she said it to must have looked at her with incredulity, or actually said, “What on earth do you mean?”
Or, the L&D nurse realized how stupid it sounded once it was out of her mouth and tried to make it all better, only failed.
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Since the due date is only an estimate that people will harrass me about getting induced after I’ll pass on getting a dating ultrasound. Besides, I know when I ovulate so that’s good enough for me.
I’ve never had a dating ultrasound, surprisingly, my babies have still come out.
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So, a woman who knows the date of her last period doesn’t count for anything? That’s how all of mine had a due date, and all of mine came within just a few days of them. I never had a dating ultrasound with either of the last 2, but based on my cycles, they were still born just after their due dates.
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HAHHAHHAHHAHAHA riiiiight. I was charting to conceive my second child, so I knew my exact ovulation and conception dates. Since I was still nursing when I conceived, my ovulation was pretty late in my cycle. The OBs and midwives I saw at appts kept insisting on the 14 day count after my last period….which would have made my daughter due 2 full weeks earlier. It was not possible and I held my ground. She arrived on her OWN 1 day shy of 40 weeks, and in perfect health, weighing 8 lbs 6 oz (exactly how big I predicted based on our family history!!). Heh heh. Idiots.
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Cmat Reply:
May 5th, 2010 at 8:20 am (Quote)
Lol scary.. I’m charting to concieve my second child and I hope I don’t have to deal with that. That’s pretty ignorant to assume even when we KNOW when we ovulated that we ovulated on cycle day 14.
There is ignorance written all over that statement. I guess it works though, if you stay pregnant forever you get the beautiful hair and glowing skin! I loved being pregnant until the very end so I’ll take that! Just make it so I’m pregnant at the 20ish week mark forever, k Doc?
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Jane Reply:
May 5th, 2010 at 8:35 am (Quote)
You don’t have to deal with it. You can tell them the day you ovulated and that you “don’t know” the date of your LMP.
You can also do what I had to in one particularly stupid practice and grab the wheel, plug in your ovulation date, and then look at the LMP it predicts based on that (since it had pointers for both) and then suddenly remember that your LMP was on THAT day.
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Bamff Reply:
May 5th, 2010 at 3:08 pm (Quote)
I was going to suggest what you did, move your LMP to whatever will fit your ovulation date. I had to do that with my third so that the doctors wouldn’t give me a super early due date (ended up homebirthing and she was born 4 days past the due date I came up with).
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Heather P Reply:
May 5th, 2010 at 3:10 pm (Quote)
Yep. For my first I had an OB and my OB’s nurse stared blankly at my chart that I brought in with me. I simplified it for her and told her when the conception date was. They didn’t push the issue that I didn’t give them a LMP date.
My homebirth midwives for my second baby were a bit more knowledgeable about charting and didn’t bat an eye when I told them that I ovulated on day 22 of my cycle.
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Suzanne Reply:
May 6th, 2010 at 5:19 am (Quote)
My sister has to use IVF to get pregnant. So, not only is the date of conception extremely obvious, but the doctor is actually there for it.
They wanted to use the due date based on her LMP instead of, you know, the super-accurate conception date, because they had one of those wheel things and that’s what it said to do.
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Amy C Reply:
May 6th, 2010 at 8:42 am (Quote)
I was also charting (and nursing) and knew I ovulated late that cycle. I also happened to have several early ultrasounds, which confirmed my dates exactly. I ended up switching care later in my pregnancy (long story) and one OB I saw asked for my LMP. I gave it to him but told him that I’d ovulated a little late, and also gave him the date of ovulation and my due date based on that. He looked at me like I was stupid and said, “Well, what did the dating ultrasound say?” I said the same date, and only then did he accept it.
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The Deranged Housewife had this to say,
May 5, 2010 @ 8:27 am (Quote)
Uhhh…I’m a’ thinkin’ that baby is gonna come out no matter what you say, Nurse…So that would be it’s due date. Right?
I’ve know women to purposely lie about their LMP dates just to buy themselves time. 
In fact, with my last I didn’t know my LMP but I knew the date of conception (they NEVER believe you when you tell them that), so when my date matched the u/s, but not theirs, it bought me four extra days.
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Jane Reply:
May 5th, 2010 at 8:37 am (Quote)
Nurse, to me: Oh, and how do you KNOOOOOOW you ovulated on that date?
Me: Well, my basal temperature went up four tenths of a degree. Also, my cervical mucus had changed in quality from tacky to slippery-stretchy a few days before, and the day after the temperature rise, it went to scant before drying up all together. Plus, that day my cervix was soft and low, and the next day it was firm and high.
Nurse: …. Oh. So I guess you do know.
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Michelle Potter Reply:
May 5th, 2010 at 10:32 am (Quote)
You are so my hero, Jane.
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Jane Reply:
May 5th, 2010 at 10:39 am (Quote)
Not heroic, not at all. It didn’t occur to me at the time that I was doing anything other than answering a question. I wasn’t quite as anti-OB then as I became about, oh, six weeks later when the practice showed its true colors.
But dang did I know the sympto-thermal method symptoms, and I had a chart, and I knew how to read it. 
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Impossible to have a due date without one?!
That just takes the cake.
I wonder how my babies managed to come out, I didn’t have a “dating” ultrasound with my last 3 pregnancies.
2 of those 3 I had zero ultrasound, and the youngest one I had only one ultrasound because the CNM wanted visual confirmation whether or not she was breech (she was, and I knew she was, she did flip back around eventually).
Oddly enough that same CNM actually BELIEVED ME that I knew when I conceived and didn’t hassle me about having medically unnecessary procedures. Go figure.
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I submitted this one…It was a client of mine who had received prenatal care from her midwife her entire pregnancy, had perfect regular cycles and knew her LMP, knew exactly when she ovulated and was very sure of conception, but because she didn’t have an ultrasound the OB nurse patted her on the knee and said, “oh honey, An LMP date and ovulation…(tharr be more) Peer into the depths date aren’t reliable at all. We can only get a true due date with an ultrasound.” (rollseyes) She was in labor only three days past her due date….but the nurse was sure she was early because she was small….She had a full term 6.5 pound baby.
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I feel so fortunate that even through three children at three different facilities (two hospitals, one home birth), care providers, nurses and other techs, that I have never had such insolence as what I read in these submissions imposed upon me. However, I can say that my husband’s family, which are very medically brainwashed, do give me a lot of crap and disrespect about my beliefs and medical/medicinal decisions. I’m just glad I’m strong in my convictions and I fight for what I want and am educated about my options.
oh yes, regarding this L&D nurse.. dillhole.
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Birth Unplugged had this to say,
May 5, 2010 @ 2:13 pm (Quote)
Ummm, yeah…a lot of practices don’t even routinely do first trimester ultrasounds and their patients still have due dates. Not that your baby needs a due date to be born or cares what it is
I think it’s ridiculous that a lot of care providers will only put down either an LMP or ultrasound due date. What do they think fertility carting is, some kind of voodoo?
The OB whose practice I left during my 1st pregnancy justified doing elective inductions at 39 weeks because ultrasounds give him “more accurate” due dates, so that would prevent him from accidentally getting a premature baby because the date was off. I’m not even going to go there with how messed up that logic is.
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This absurdly funny.
I wasn’t paying attention to my cycles when I conceived this pregnancy, but I knew exactly when I ovulated. How you ask? Well, since my second birth, my ovulation has been horrendously painful and you can’t miss it. At all.
So the morning after our accident, when the ovulation pains started, I knew I ovulated. When the pains stopped late morning/early afternoon, I knew we’d conceived.
I let them do their dating u/s and low and behold, they said I was exactly as far along as I said I was. Surprise, surprise.
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You don’t have to deal with it. You can tell them the day you ovulated and that you “don’t know” the date of your LMP.<
When I conceived my youngest I hadn’t had a period in 6 years between breastfeeding and some health problems…when I told the midwife this she wanted me to remember when my period USED to come and go with that date. Funny though, when I did have a dating US they nade a big deal about how innaccurate dating ultrasounds are!?!
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Heather P Reply:
May 5th, 2010 at 9:02 pm (Quote)
She wanted you to go with when your period used to come? Did you give her the date from six years prior?
I had to transfer to the hospital for a D&C for my second pregnancy that ended in miscarriage. They didn’t seem to understand that my LMP was in Nov 2003 and it was Nov 2006.
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Jane Reply:
May 6th, 2010 at 4:32 am (Quote)
When I had 21 months of breastfeeding amenorrhea between two of my babies, the nurse was shocked that I hadn’t had a period since my previous yearly appointment. “What drug are you taking?” she exclaimed, and I said, “This baby could stop a train.” But I had wondered how they’d deal with it if I conceived without having a period in between, since then they wouldn’t know when to hound me to get an induction and I’d refuse the dating U/S. They’d all be confused and have to trust me about my ovulation date.
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I had ovulation dates with my first three, but my last one? nothing. no period date (couldn’t remember) no ovulation date (wasn’t paying attention) and no ultrasound. thus no due date. just kind of a ‘probably some time from late october to mid november, maybe’….
my midwife didn’t care, and neither did I. well, except she tried telling me I’d go earlier because the baby was bigger. I said I bet I was just getting a bigger baby. sure enough, 11 lb 6 oz born nov. 7.
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Sarah Dorrance-Minch had this to say,
May 10, 2010 @ 3:25 pm (Quote)
However did we poor mortals get along before the various iterations of the Machine That Goes “Bing!” were brought onto the market? It’s a wonder we were able to guess at the expected time of a baby’s birth at all. For that matter, how did we manage to breed?
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Mama Mirage had this to say,
May 28, 2010 @ 7:10 pm (Quote)
*sigh* The stupidity hurts my head! :p
Like many of you, I knew the precise day I ovulated with my most recent 2 pregnancies. With my son, at my first prenatal, they congratulated me on my positive home pregnancy test and then asked me when I’m due so they could write it on the chart. I handed them my chart and told them my due date that I had calculated based on that chart. If I’d gone by LMP I’d have “had him a week late” but going by my date I went into labor the evening after my due date. If they’d been difficult about it I’d have overshared the juicy tidbit that there was only ONE time in like a 2 week span surrounding the ovulation spike on my BBT chart that the hubby and I were *that* close. It wasn’t immaculate conception so they could either declare it a miracle or accept my date. Hah! 
This current pregnancy they kept asking me about my LMP. I said I didn’t know, they kept asking, I told them I know my precise HOUR of conception so the LMP is irrelevant. They kept asking anyway. I finally told them but then INSISTED on keeping MY due date instead of calculating one based on LMP. Thankfully midwives are much less anal about “needing” to prove or disprove the mother who knows by calculating based on uncertain variables like LMP and ultrasound.
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So, the ultrasound is what determines when the baby will be born, not ovulation. I guess what I learned in high school sex ed class was wrong. It’s a good thing I had an ultrasound with my 2 month old, otherwise I’d still be pregnant! *rolls eyes*
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Wow.. I am 33 (will be 34 in October) and my mom had 2 ultrasounds when pregnant with me IN BRAZIL!!! They were common and widespread at the time down there!! Strange to see people here saying that they are in their late 20′s, early 30′s and that they never had an ultrasound!! My brother is 27, born at Cook County Hospital in Chicago, and my mom had an ultrasound with him as well… go figure!!!
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Again with the arrogance! Ugh…
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Ndakkitten Reply:
May 5th, 2010 at 4:59 am Ndakkitten(Quote)
Yeah, that’s why they teach us how to calculate due dates in nursing school. Because it is completely useless information that no one needs because we all have ultrasounds. NOT!
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