Posted by My OB said WHAT?!?.
Apr
7
Posted by My OB said WHAT?!?.
“…You Don’t Have A *REAL* Doctor.”
“Have you ever considered that maybe you’ve had multiple miscarriages because you don’t have a real doctor?” -Emergency Room Doctor to mother who came in for early pregnancy bleeding, after several miscarriages. The mother was using a midwife for pregnancy care.
There are 58 comments to this post.
A “real” doctor couldn’t prevent most miscarriages anyhow!
Even if he wanted to say she needed some kind of fertility testing, how about being professional. “You might want to consider getting a referral to a fertility specialist who can do genetic testing and get a hormone panel done to see if this is something preventable.”
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Er, women under the care of a midwife with continuity of care experience less miscarriages than those under the care of a doctor. To the “real” doctor: Go do some reading before you come up with stupid comments like that.
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Gem Reply:
April 7th, 2010 at 5:40 am (Quote)
I’m not sure about that — stats, links? If a MW can’t cause a MC, how can an OB?
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Fiona Black Reply:
April 8th, 2010 at 5:19 am (Quote)
http://www2.cochrane.org/reviews/en/ab004667.html
“Women who were randomised to receive midwife-led care were less likely to lose their baby before 24 weeks’ gestation, although there were no differences in the risk of losing the baby after 24 weeks, or overall.”
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“You’re absolutely right. I need to see a REAL doctor. Do you know where I can find one?”
And here I was under the impression that most miscarriages were caused by chromosomal abnormalities. Maybe midwives are radioactive or something.
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The Deranged Housewife had this to say,
Apr 7, 2010 @ 5:51 am (Quote)
Oh yes, I’m sure that’s it. The midwife – wearing a turban and smelling of incense – was giving me herbs to *make* me have miscarriages without my knowledge. That’s got to be it!
What a friggin’ dumbass. I feel so badly for this mama.
LOL Erin – I love your comment!
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My Mom said something similar to me when I was 22 and miscarried. My husband and I had just come back from a routine 14 week ultrasound where they told us the baby had died in utero at 8 weeks. I was facing an emergency D&C, and my Mom started screaming at me that if I had had a “real” doctor this would never have happened and the next time I get pregnant I better drop this stupid notion of a midwife and stick with an OB.
Hubby marched me out of the house and I could hear my Dad start hollering at her…first time I ever heard my Dad raise his voice in my life.
My heart goes out to this poor woman who is in need of some compassion and finds nothing but stupidity.
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When I noted that I had been seeing a midwife, they noted in the chart – “No prenatal care”.
WTH?
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Jane Reply:
April 7th, 2010 at 6:59 am (Quote)
Is “medical harassment” a crime? Is falsifying medical records?
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The Deranged Housewife Reply:
April 7th, 2010 at 7:57 am (Quote)
Isn’t that so deeply insulting? Give me a friggin’ break.
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Sheva Reply:
April 7th, 2010 at 8:03 am (Quote)
It’s like we’re in the dark ages again, with witches and whatnot!
And, just for the record, the whooshing sound and the breeze you feel when the doc runs into the exam room and right back out may be ‘prenatal-something’ but it is certainly not ‘care’.
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cmat Reply:
April 7th, 2010 at 12:29 pm (Quote)
That’s just ridiculous. I had an OB for my pregnancy with my son and I don’t feel like what I got qualified as “care.” I’m pretty sure that I’ll get that care I was missing when I go with a midwife for kiddo #2.
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Doc Reply:
April 9th, 2010 at 12:14 pm (Quote)
Umm that is a big no no. Wow, I love it blatant lying on legal documents my favorite!!
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Margarett the Midwife had this to say,
Apr 7, 2010 @ 7:04 am (Quote)
Yeah, I get letters all the time that state my client’s haven’t received prenatal care even tho we send copies of their records!!! And they send the letters to ME at my BUSINESS name and address!!
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Sheva Reply:
April 7th, 2010 at 8:05 am (Quote)
If that wasn’t so absurd it would be hysterical! Who do you get these letters from??
You should invest in a bright yellow highlighter and highlight your name and title on every page.
Do you think they would notice then?
Sheesh.
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Margarett the Midwife Reply:
April 7th, 2010 at 5:47 pm (Quote)
I get these from the hospital I transfer moms to if we have to go in from a home birth and I GO TO THE HOSPITAL WITH THE FAMILY, sometimes from the u/s dept!!
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Jane Reply:
April 8th, 2010 at 4:52 am (Quote)
How does that work? If they think you’re there as a family member or an observer, why would they send you a letter? People who have visited me in the hospital have never received letters saying “This is to confirm that Jane has received prenatal care.”
If they’re sending you a letter, it’s a de-facto acknowledgment that you’re a care provider.
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Margarett the Midwife Reply:
April 8th, 2010 at 6:54 am (Quote)
What to say? It is just the way it is, and I don’t take it personally, I have GOBS of happy families and beautiful babies so don’t care what others think!! I know I am doing what I was CALLED to do, and if someone wants to think I’m a radical nutjob, oh well! My families opinions are what count!!!
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Margarett the Midwife Reply:
April 8th, 2010 at 6:54 am (Quote)
And I have been a midwife in Oklahoma for 22+ years!! I’m used to it!!!
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Melanie (Midwife) Reply:
September 6th, 2010 at 1:45 pm (Quote)
Wow! More power to you! We Texas midwives are rooting for the legal situation in Oklahoma. Though I have to say, delivering the occasional baby in OK (I live an hour north of Dallas) is very nice.
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Maybe I went to a midwife because she
is more compassionate than most real doctors when giving me care. Hmmm.
I will say when I miscarried, I did have nice OB who treated me well during that time, but she could not prevent my 16 week nor my 5 week after.
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I’d like to see this “doctor” that could prevent miscarriages too. Does this person exist?
I had a miscarriage with midwives and my midwives were compassionate and caring. I ended up having to transfer to a hospital for a needed D&C. Except for the OB everyone at the hospital treated me like I was ruining their day by losing my baby on their watch. The OB was a great example of excellence in her profession. If I’d been planning a hospital birth for my next baby I might have gone to her. I had my baby at home 11 months after the D&C with the same midwives.
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When I had to take my daughter to a neurologist, I was asked all kinds of questions, including sonogram results. I told her I didn’t have a sonogram with my daughter (I was with a HB midwife, and while she suggested I go for one, she respected my decision not to.).
My MIL pushed herself to come with me against my will, so she was sitting right there in the neuro’s office with me and my baby. She never came to terms with me choosing a HB, although she out up a tolerant front.
In any case, while the neuro was taken aback at my decision not to get a sonogram, MIL dear decided to interject with, “She had [dramatic pause] NO prenatal testing.” Which is what went down on the record. D:
Urine tests, GBS, blood pressure, several blood tests, including blood sugar, (and heart rate checks for the baby goes without saying)… GAH! No tests at all, nope.
(Well, she also told the neuro that I only took my then 10 month old o the pediatrician once in her life. Because that was the only trip she knew about. Does she think I inform her of every pedi visit?? Sigh.)
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Jane Reply:
April 7th, 2010 at 11:18 am (Quote)
After that kind of display, I’d have asked the doctor to excuse MIL from the room so we could actually have a medical exam, not a witch-burning.
I’m so sorry you went through that. 
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GAMZu Reply:
April 8th, 2010 at 8:43 am (Quote)
You don’t know my MIL! LOL. She’d make my life a living hell if I did that.
I didn’t want her to come at all, but the office is far from my house and we don’t have a car. I was planning to use public transportation, but MIL wasn’t going to have her precious granddaughter be exposed to subway air, so she drove. I didn’t think it would be THAT bad. The 2nd time I tried to keep our appointments secret, but she grilled DH and he caved. Oh, was it awful!
Now I just don’t let it happen. I go by subway. It’s so much more pleasant to have the baby on my chest than in the carseat, anyhow. I love our quiet time.
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beccaisadoula Reply:
April 8th, 2010 at 4:32 am (Quote)
Agreed! This is the exact reason I don’t allow grandparents to come to doctor’s visits with me.
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I had this same issue when I was pregnant. I ended up in the ER with first trimester bleeding. They asked me who I was seeing for my prenatal care. When I told them about my midwives, the nurse rolled her eyes and left. When they gave me my discharge papers (The placenta was low lying, but the baby was fine), it said: no provider for ob care. I was like, “Hey! I have a provider.” And the nurse said, “Oh, not really. We dont consider a midwife to be a provider of care.”
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Jane Reply:
April 7th, 2010 at 11:20 am (Quote)
I think you can force them to write on the records that you DO have a provider for care and that the patient disputes the records as written due to intentional falsification.
Either that or YOU write it on the records and sign and date it. Then report them for falsifying medical records.
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Doc Reply:
April 9th, 2010 at 12:21 pm (Quote)
What you do next time, is request to see the head of patient advocacy and hospital safety, and with them and those nurses ask them why they are ignoring your wishes and demoralizing your choice as a free women available to make her own life choices, why they find the need to belittle you for seeking alternative and scientifically proven safer care. you can ask for the hospitals general legal adviser as well. The other option is for the ladies to contact local ” news” about the bad treatment. We as a TV ridden nation need to use the media sources to our advantage. lets take these malus malficarum ( Witches hammer, a book used to “find’ witches hiding in the community) wielding hunters to the lime light and grill them with their nether parts on the hot plate!
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I guess it would depend if midwifery was regulated in the region where this comment was made. So prior to now, women who received care from a midwife were recognized as having no prenatal care, but even now women who seek care from an unregulated midwife are seen as having no prenatal care. Having said this, there is no way either speciality can cause a miscarriage.
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I saw a midwife with my second (miscarraige) and third (live birth) pregnancies. The midwife was a CNM practicing in the hospital and she was awesome.
With my first (missed) miscarriage, we found out that we’d lost the baby at my very caused that miscarriage if I haven’t even seen her yet?? Unreal.
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JoAnna Reply:
April 7th, 2010 at 10:53 am (Quote)
Whoa, that second paragraph got chopped. It should say:
With my first (missed) miscarriage, we found out that we’d lost the baby at my very first appointment. How could my midwife have caused that miscarriage if I haven’t even seen her yet?? Unreal.
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“As opposed to my imaginary midwife?”
The last thing you should tell a miscarrying mama is that she could have done something to prevent it. Like that isn’t already going through her mind?! If someone had told methat I could have prevented my miscarriage I would have hauled off and punched them!
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“No, I have a REAL Midwife. Who is not the cause of my repeated miscarriages.
I guess you must not be a REAL Doctor either, or you would know that the care provider does not cause the miscarriages. But thanks for being such a heartless bastard.”
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cmat Reply:
April 7th, 2010 at 12:34 pm (Quote)
My thoughts exactly. I think its a pretty heartless thing to say. When in doubt, stop and think about what you’re going to say. What will the impact be?? Negative? Okay, don’t say it!
Engage brain before opening mouth. I’m going to wear a tshirt that says that to my first appointment for kiddo #2.
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Liz Chalmers had this to say,
Apr 7, 2010 @ 3:35 pm (Quote)
For the person asking for references to back up the idea that the miscarriage rate is lower with midwives, here’s one from the Cochrane review:
http://www2.cochrane.org/reviews/en/ab004667.html
“Women who were randomised to receive midwife-led care were less likely to lose their baby before 24 weeks’ gestation, although there were no differences in the risk of losing the baby after 24 weeks, or overall.”
I do wonder if that might be because of less prenatal testing resulting in fewer terminations, given that the overall loss rate was unchanged. But I seem to recall reading in other places that the natural miscarriage rate is indeed lower with midwives.
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Liz Reply:
April 7th, 2010 at 4:03 pm (Quote)
It could also be due to misdiagnosed miscarriages. I think that most Ob’s want to do D&Cs while midwives are more likely to let you miscarry naturally. That would raise the miscarriage rate for OBs because viable babies are killed during a D&C.
Also, it could be due to that amount of ultrasounds, sonograms, vaginal exams, tests, etc… that are more likely to happen or happen more often with OBs while midwives tend to be hands off during the first trimester. Just my thoughts.
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Liz Chalmers Reply:
April 7th, 2010 at 4:54 pm (Quote)
Though in that case, the overall loss rate would be higher for OBs, but what Cochrane is saying is that although the pre-24 week loss rate is lower for midwives, the overall rate is the same, in which case midwives must be seeing more fetal demises after 24 weeks. The only way I can tie those two things together is if some OB clients terminate pregnancies that result in stillbirths under midwifery care. (Not saying that midwifery clients don’t terminate, just that with a tendency toward less prenatal testing, midwifery clients would be less likely to know of a fetus incompatible with life)
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Jane Reply:
April 8th, 2010 at 6:44 am (Quote)
The “no increase in risk after 24 weeks or overall” makes no sense because if the OBs are seeing an increased number of losses pre-24 weeks, and they’re all having the same number of losses post-24 weeks, then the OBs should have more overall. No?
Most medical terminations are done after the baby has the 18 week ultrasound, or 20 weeks. I suspect 24 weeks was chosen as the cutoff because by then most medical terminations would have been performed. And that might be bumping up the OB numbers.
It’s also possible,t hough,that midwives are giving nutritional information that might enable a woman who’s got bad nutrition to maintain a pregnancy she might have lost had she remained badly nourished. (ie, vitamins, etc) and possibly the midwives might also be suggesting lifestyle changes that the OB care doesn’t consider important enough to work into the nine-minute visits.
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Fiona Reply:
April 8th, 2010 at 5:18 am (Quote)
Thanks Liz. I was trying to look for it but I’m 39 weeks pregnant and not focussing too well. I’ll repost it as a reply to my original post.
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Doc Reply:
April 9th, 2010 at 12:25 pm (Quote)
Think about how many vaccinations they push on you when you are pregnant? They try and catch you up on all of your “missed’ child hood vaccines while your pregnant! ( NO ONE SHOULD BE VACCINATED)
There is great controversy over the vaccination of pregnant women, and the immune response it triggers. Look into miscarriage and H1n1…its scary. You’re more liekly to miscarriage with an OB because they are interfering with your natural process much more then a midwife would even consider. ( a good one that is)
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Hi! I’m the Original Poster, and I didn’t realize this comment was even posted! 
I just wanted to share the whole story:
I went to the emergency room for early pregnancy bleeding, since I have had a few miscarriages. A sono found one empty sac and one live, healthy baby (one miscarried twin and one viable pregnancy).
First, the E.R. doc said, “Have you ever considered that maybe you’ve had multiple miscarriages because you don’t have a real doctor?” when I told him that I use midwifery care.
Then, when the sono was complete, he said, “So, you’ve got one empty sac and one heartbeat in there. Everything looks good for that one, but I give it a 50/50 shot at best, because you’ve got such a lousy track record.”
Interestingly enough, I took my 20 month old son to the same E.R. last week with a suspicious rash and got the SAME doctor, who said, “Could be measles, could be chicken pox. I’m not a pediatrician.” That was his whole diagnosis. The discharge papers actually said, “Dx: Follow up with pediatrician; not sure of the origin of this rash– may be measles or chicken pox.” He didn’t do any testing, so I took him to a children’s hospital and it was chicken pox.
The finale was when I took my son to the children’s hospital and told the triage nurse about that doc (including the back story of the miscarried twin). The triage nurse said, “Let me guess. Was it at [hospital] with [Idiot Doctor's name]?” Amazing.
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To the young woman who posted this comment, has your midwife ever had you see a Maternal Fetal Medicine doctor for evaluation of your miscarriages?. I ask this because I have met so many women that have had serial miscarriages due to certain antibodies in their blood. For instance Phospholipid antibody which causes clotting is cured during pregnancy with a baby aspirin
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Colleen Reply:
April 20th, 2010 at 5:16 pm (Quote)
I actually saw a specialist after my second miscarriage, and we know why I have them, but unfortunately, they’re not always preventable in my case. But thank you for the suggestion! I’m actually pretty lucky because I’m at a 50% success rate so far (I’m having my 6th child, 12th pregnancy), and was originally told when I was 17 that I’d never have ANY successful pregnancies! So looking at THAT bright side, I’m way beyond expectations, haha.
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Despicable!
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