Posted by My OB said WHAT?!?.
Posted by My OB said WHAT?!?.
“Oh Come On, Stop That! Suck It Up!”
“Oh come on, stop that. Suck it up!” – midwife to a mother shivering from the cold and epidural while being strapped to the bed, shaved, and prepped for an emergency c-section.
come a little closer so i can haul out and slap you.
disgusting. where does she get off??? is this supposed to be “tough love”??
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When I was about 12, a *dental hygienist* said the same thing to me and it made me cry. And that situation was about .05% as bad as this.
Seriously, who thinks it’s EVER ok to tell a patient of ANY kind (much less a woman in labor being prepped for SURGERY for crying out loud) to “suck it up”??
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Appalling. Simply appalling. This midwife shouldn’t be practicing.
Shivering can come from cold, fear, shock, pain, the physical effects of the epidural…none of these are things you can “suck it up” about except maybe fear, and even that depends on the person and type of fear. To say it at all is wrong – comfort is more to the point.
After giving birth to my son, I was shaking – and I’d had the epidural but not most of the other stressors. I didn’t feel cold. I just couldn’t stop shivering. They piled warm blankets on me and gave me comfort, fluids, and my baby. No one told me to “suck it up” – and no one should have told this woman to, either!
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At a birth I was at recently, the nurse anesthetist administering mom’s epidural told her to ‘get a hold of’ herself when she cried, fearfully and in pain, ‘OWWW!!’ as the needle was being inserted.
That comment by itself is pretty insensitive, but when you add to it the fact that this mom had suffered a full term loss and was facing hours of labor knowing that her baby was gone, it just makes it worse.
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Kat Reply:
April 4th, 2010 at 8:23 pm (Quote)
Oooh… that makes me want to throw up, cry, scream, and punch someone. Not necessarily in that order.
I hope others surrounding that mother were more compassionate and caring. I hope she is getting the rest and TLC she needs during this time. I wish no one ever had to go through that.
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i shook in labor with all of my kids with no epidural… what a complete *itch!!! i can’t believe the horrid insensitivity of this comment!!!
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:::shaking head::: Where do these kinds of people get off? First of all, the OR tends to be a cold room. Secondly, after a baby is born, it is totally normal for a momma to start shaking. Huge rushes of hormones cause this. Thirdly, why don’t we make you stay awake while we do major abdominal surgery on YOU and she if you don’t shake a bit!
I just attended my best friend’s C-section (necessary) and bless her poor heart, she shook for 10 mins after her baby was born & they were repairing the incision. I kept my hand on her shoulder to try to give her a “grounding” presence while she had to wait for the doc to finish. Maybe if this midwife would have done that & kept her damn mouth shut, this momma wouldn’t have such a bad memory of the birth of her child! ACK!
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That’s awful! After my unnecesearan I was freezing and shivering and they told me it was completely normal and already had warmed blankets which the put over me until they brought me to recovery where they had some hot air inflated warming blanket thing they covered me in.
I can’t believe anyone would talk that way to a woman being prepped to be cut open, while in a cold operating room wearing probably nothing but a flimsy hospital gown.
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Of course she was shivering; they routinely keep the OR colder for the comfort of the physicians and staff (with all their garb, etc. and the lights, they get very warm). Not only that, but once your body has been opened up, you lose a lot of heat. They often give you warmed blankets afterwards (which are like the only nice thing about a c/s). I asked about this after my c/s – why I was shivering so much – and the nurse basically told me I’d been opened up for upwards of 20 minutes or so and your body loses a lot of heat that way.
I think I probably would have told the midwife, “Hey, I’ll trade places with you then!” if she has no sympathy. Unfortunately, the few midwives I’ve had have been like this one.
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Poor mom. I know I’m echoing everyone else, but I also wanted to say that she did NOT deserve to be spoken to that way.
I’ve heard of people shivering from the effects of the epidural, I don’t remember why, but it’s a common side effect.
And EVEN IF the mother was totally freaking out, I think that “unplanned major abdominal surgery (with baby involved)” is on the ‘permitted’ side of the official “Irrational Freak Out” list.
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That’s revolting. I wasn’t cold while I was being prepped for my unnecesarean, but I sure was petrified and shaking from the fear. This poor mama.
My OB sucked, but the anesthesiologist was an absolute doll; he kept soothing me and patting my shoulders. What a horrid midwife; I’m so sorry!!
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