Posted by My OB said WHAT?!?.
Mar
22
Posted by My OB said WHAT?!?.
“See, If You Had Gotten The Epidural Earlier, We Could Have Been Done Already.”
“See, if you had gotten the epidural earlier, we could have been done already.” -CNM Midwife to mother in the immediate second after the baby was born, before the baby had even been brought up to the mother’s chest.
There are 22 comments to this post.
Ok, besides being mean, just mean! this is not even true!
Ok, in the times when the mother is so tense that her body is actually working against her uterus and she really needs to relax, an epidural can help her relax so her uterus can “do it’s thing”.
But usually epidurals slow down labor……… among other things.
Yes, Jane, our job is to get the baby out, in whatever way our caregiver deems necessary, depending on our level of cooperation with THE SCHEDULE. (layman’s definition of the Friedman curve.)
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The Deranged Housewife Reply:
March 22nd, 2010 at 6:37 pm (Quote)
Isn’t there a “study” that was recently released disproving this? (which I don’t believe for a second)
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The Deranged Housewife Reply:
March 22nd, 2010 at 6:38 pm (Quote)
At least not used like they typical are, at any rate. I will agree with the commenters below that sometimes they do a world of good.
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Wow. A few choice words come to mind. Most of them inappropriate for mixed company, and several of them unflattering to the med-wife’s parentage (who are most definitely not to blame for their progeny’s really bad choices).
It’s really sad some people get to call themselves “midwife” without even having a CLUE what the midwifery model of care even is.
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I have never seen an epidural speed labor up, only slow it down.
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Heather P Reply:
March 22nd, 2010 at 8:28 am (Quote)
I have, but only because the mother was so stressed out by the unneccesary pitocin that she couldn’t relax. Once she got her epidural she went from 4cm to pushing in a half hour. I was watching the pit levels too. Every time her nurse walked in and saw her quad peak contractions she turned the pit down.
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Kate Reply:
March 22nd, 2010 at 4:42 pm (Quote)
I must say I’ve seen this twice:
Once with a VBAC mama who was psychologically unable to relax and finish opening (her c-section baby was a placental abruption and she lost the baby).
Once with a mama who had been in labor for over 50 hours and had a strong urge to push against a cervical lip. Her baby ended up being 10.5 pounds.
Both mamas were to relax after they got the meds, and both opened up really quickly and were able to push their babies out really efficiently. The perfect use for an epidural!
That’s why I always say I’m not opposed to the technology itself, just how often it is over used.
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Heather Reply:
March 22nd, 2010 at 5:16 pm (Quote)
I had it happen to me. I wasn’t afraid of birth, I had labored naturally for 22 1/2 hours in my previous birth, I knew all forms of natural pain relief and relaxation and used them and still, I was in such unbearable pain that my labor crawled by until, 16 hours into active labor (7 humors after the pain and transition-brain hit), I was given Nubain and an hour later, an epidural and I finally started progressing. My daughter was born 6 1/2 hours after the epidural went in. It wore off while I was pushing and it was amazing, as that was my VBAC, so I got to feel everything as she came into the world, easily, with 20 minutes of “pushing” (I actually did very little pushing) and she slipped out with a contraction, like a slippery little rocket, right into my hands.
It’s a tool, like any other, but no one should ever tell a mother she needs one other than herself! What an awful CNM 
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The Deranged Housewife had this to say,
Mar 22, 2010 @ 7:22 am (Quote)
This is so sad. To take those wonderful moments of having just given birth and turn them into … *this* … that’s kind of like turning to the grieving widow at her husband’s funeral and asking, “So, when are you gonna get married again?”
This just makes me so mad.
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JoAnna had this to say,
Mar 22, 2010 @ 9:14 am (Quote)
Lady, if you want a 9-5 schedule, where you get off at the same time every day, you are in the wrong profession.
(Not to be picky, but isn’t “CNM midwife” redundant?)
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Unfortunately in America, most CNM’s are MEDWIVES and not MIDWIVES! They have mimicked the medical philosophy of care in the hospitals. Sometimes it is the only way to keep their jobs! Such a shame!!!
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Sheva Reply:
March 22nd, 2010 at 11:01 am (Quote)
My CNM midwife 
explained to me that often, they way they practice depends on WHY they became midwives. Was it their first choice, and it was just that they chose this method of education over CPM education? Or was it that they were nurses, and midwifery just seemed like the next logical step in their career?
She told me that about 1/2 of her midwifery class was the first type, and 1/2 was the second type.
It’s what’s in the midwife’s heart that counts, not the abc’s after her name.
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Knitted in the Womb Reply:
March 22nd, 2010 at 5:52 pm (Quote)
Same is true with lactation consultants! There are some IBCLC’s out there that only got the certification because it was a career move or she was specifically told by her nursing supervisor “we need an IBCLC on staff, go take the course.” A good question to ask a lactation consultant is “did you breastfeed your children?” If she didn’t, then ask “why?” to determine if she is someone who will really support you.
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I guess OBs aren’t the only ones with crystal balls.
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